My Disney Diet - Day 49

While I was busy tripping, slipping and falling all over nature this weekend, I did not have the opportunity to focus on my diet goal. Since we did not want to totally USE the house, I had to pack food that would cause the least amount of mess - that meant burgers and hot dogs. Gone were my lo-cal/lo-fat snacks and in their place was family-friendly snacks. That's not to say that I made a pig of myself, but I definitely was not on my game.

For example, on Saturday I started my day at a scrapbooking event and had my yummy little Bagelful (whole grain). It went down-hill right after that. I was crampy and all full of menstral angst and when the box of thin mints came out, well, I couldn't help myself. I had the suggested serving of 4. Then we ordered lunch from Chic Fil-A. I didn't want a salad, I was craving something naughty, so I caved and ate the FRIED chic fil a sandwich with coleslaw. But I drank my water. And then ate 4 more thin mints. Bad Stace! When we got to the lake, we grilled burgers (with 93% lean meat) and I had myself a rather tasty cheeseburger and some corn. Clearly nutrition of any kind was not a priority. I had dessert - 2 Grandma's chocolate chip cookies. Did I mention that I had my period?

Sunday wasn't much better. I did the bagelful for breakfast again, lunch was 2 hotdogs with saurkraut and mustard, 2 more Grandma's cookies for an afternoon snack and then chinese take out for dinner WITH the fried rice! I'm not proud, people. True all the running up and down those three flights of stairs gave me a heck of a workout (my calves STILL hurt). And did I mention that I drank soda all weekend? What is up with that??? It's like I don't even HAVE a goal that I am trying to meet and that I actually WANT to be the fat sister! Remember that show "Fat Actress"? Well, we can all work on the sequel - "Fat Sister" starring me.

Today I am back in the swing of things. I ate like a normal person who is trying to lose weigh, I walked 60 minutes on the treadmill (20 minutes of it on an incline) and did 30 minutes sculping with my little hand weights. There was no soda in my hands today and I was back to taking my supplements. It's day four of my cycle and by day six I should be able to get back on the scale without screaming.

We'll see. Think thin, y'all!

One with nature? Not so much...

Last night we got back from a quick family weekend getaway up to Lake Gaston. Frank is doing some work up there and we had use of this beautiful house for the weekend. This was no cabin-by-the-lake deal, it was a McMansion with an amazing location and view.

We arrived there late Saturday afternoon and immediately fell in love with the place. The house was enormous but we mainly utilized the "guest quarters" on the lower level (aka - the basement). This was no basement like I'd ever seen, however, it was fully decorated, had a bathroom bigger and cleaner than my own at home and had french doors that led outside to the incredible lake view. Not too shabby for Stace. So we're there, the kids are swimming, we're lounging on the private beach, we grilled, we played pool, it was amazing. Now, I am one of those people who does not 'do' quiet vacations. I have to be doing something. Drop me in the middle of any theme park and I am like a mini Comando. Put me out on a lake with nothing to do and I am an accident waiting to happen.

Saturday night the boys all went fishing down by one of the boat houses (there were two to chose from). Not particularly caring to bait a hook, I stayed in the house. I had never played pool before but had watched my men play earlier and figured this was my chance to practice alone and then I'd surprise them and play them when they came back from fishing. HA! Fat chance of that happening. You see, somehow during one of my less-than-spectacular-solo-games, my finger got caught between the pole and the side of the pool table and I sliced a really big gash in it. I bled like a trauma victim! Now I'm running around this McMansion trying to find some bandaids - no small task when there are like 5 bathrooms split up over three levels! And of course, they were in the LAST bathroom I checked. Now, my middle finger is all wrapped up and my career as a pool player is officially over.

Sunday morning, while the boys went out to fish again, I stayed in, cleaned up and decided to surprise them with breakfast brought out to them on the pier on a tray. I had on my fancy new sandles and was feeling sassy, when out of nowhere on this perfectly manicured lawn, I find the only pinecone around, step on it and twist my ankle! Now mind you, nothing fell off the tray and no one saw me BUT my ankle swelled up and I could barely walk for most of the day! Clearly me and nature have issues. There was an old episode of "The Odd Couple" where Felix and Oscar go off to a cabin in the woods for Oscar to work on his book. Felix has nothing to do with himself so he goes off exploring in the woods. Every animal he meets he tries to befriend and they all bite him and by the end of the episode, he has a bandage on every finger. If we had stayed at that house any longer I have no doubt that would have been me.

All in all, it really was a great weekend. It was nice to get away and have it just be the four of us out of our own environment. And hey, I got to provide the comic relief. Not too shabby at all.

My Disney Diet - Day 46

Yesterday was an interesting day. I had an egg mcmuffin for breakfast, two peanut butter cups for lunch and a small chocolate blizzard with oreos for a mid-afternoon snack. Can you guess what time of the month it is? Dang, and I was doing so well with the eating right up until then! I feel like a blimp today and although I know it is only temporary, it is still hard to keep up the momentum when you feel like there is a vice grip on your uterus AND you want to eat Hostess cupcakes for breakfast. Luckily, there are none in the house.

But up until yesterday, things were cruising along beautifully. I have to kick my workout up a notch because I have hit a plateau. I can do the time on the treadmill without huffing and puffing - the heart rate isn't going up like it used to and so now I am comfortable and that will not help me achieve my goal. Darn it. Comfortable it so good! My music works to this particular pace/speed of my walking. Now I'll have to make ANOTHER disco CD! I'm running low on new and fun dance music that isn't offensive. So I will search.

I am burning an average of 700 calories a day in walking - that is way up from the 250-300 calories a day that I was doing in the beginning. There are 80 days left until the trip and I have around 13 pounds to go. It sounds simple but it's not. I would love to squeeze through the crowds coming through the castle in the morning without feeling like I AM the crowd. Or, oh, how I long to hop on the monorail and say "Oh, I think I'll stand" because I am not so exhausted that I NEED to sit. Or to look at my sister and say "I'll race you to Expedition Everest" and not pass out before I even get on the scary ride. They are small and petty goals, but that's okay.

I wish all of you a very Disney Day and remember...think thin!

The Many Meanings of No

No. Such a small word. There is something definitive and powerful about it. To the normal adult it means what it says. No - "Do you want that?" "No." Okay, clearly you don't want it. "Can you go there?" "No." Okay, you can't go. To the teenage mind, no means many, many things and clearly has no power behind it.

Today's examples:
Son: "Mom, I want to go to Beckah's today. Can you pick me up tonight?"
Me: "No."
Son: "But what if her parent's took me there, can't you just pick me up?"
Me: "No. I have plans later and we cannot pick you up."
Son: "Can't you change your plans?"
Me: "No."
Son: "But I really need a ride home!"
Me: "No you don't because now you're not going at all."
Son: "But I already told her I'd go."
Me: "Then I guess you lied."

That was our first phone conversation. There were three more after it that had very similar outcomes. To my teenage boy, no is negotiable. It's probably my fault because usually after an hour of badgering me, I will cave and give him what he wants - but he knows that he has pissed me off and that I am not happy and he will have to kiss my butt repeatedly for DAYS to make it up to me. He's okay with that. I no longer am. At 16, he should be beyond this childish whining. Apparently he is not.

Tonights discussion was about a spontaneous trip up to a lake house in Virginia this weekend. We just found out about the opportunity today but the boy already had plans made. He's 16, it's not like he had plans to attend an important seminar or have tickets to a broadway show, they all involved ...well, HIM.

Parents: "We're going up to the lake this weekend."
Son: "But I have plans, can't I stay home by myself?"
Parents: "No, you're not old enough."
Son: "But I have plans, You can trust me."
Parents: "We do trust you but you are too young to stay home overnight alone."
Son: "But I'll only truly be alone for 16 hours. Can't I just stay home?"
Parents: "No."
Son: "Well I'm not going."
Parents: (Filled with rage at this point in the day) "You will go if we tell you to"
Son: "No."

AAHHH!!! Can you imagine him using this logic in different situations? How about getting arrested for something - "Gee officer, can't I leave this jail cell?" "No," says the officer. "But, I only broke a little law. You can trust me." Can you see it. Or how about "You see, boss, I would like to have finished that project but I had a date with my girlfriend. We wanted to have a picnic. Can't you just reschedule that presentation?" Boss answers "No." "Oh, come on, I mean can't these other people just cut me some slack?"

Pray that it ends soon. Before my head actually explodes.

Bring it on...

Sometimes you really have to pay attention to what your children are saying to truly understand what in the world is going on. Michael rambles. A lot. I mean, a LOT. Yesterday morning he tells me how he doesn't think he should go to school and participate in field day because he poked his hand with a pencil the day before. "We'll put a band aid on it," I tell him. "Miss Bracket said it didn't need a band aid," he answered. Okay, end of story. You don't have any real problem with your hand and are just looking for an excuse to stay home. Been there, done that, go get dressed.

Last night at dinner, the subject comes up again. He clearly has a mark on his hand. Bad mother, I know. So he takes a shower, gets his hand all clean, we use peroxide on the mark (which is quite red) and Frank determines that there is still something in the hand. "I got all of the poisonous lead out," Michael informs us. Comforting. Now the long-buried-doctor in my husband comes out. We're disinfecting tweezers and pins to try and pry the foreign object out of the now screaming child. There is blood, sweat and tears (from all family members at this point) when Frank finally stood up and said, "I need a magnifying glass." Now I'm ready to grab my child and run directly to the emergency room because the man is scaring me. I get Michael to calm down by the time Frank returned with the magnifying eye-piece and he STILL can't tell for sure if something's in the there. Now I call the doctor, or the nurse-advice-line. This kind-voiced woman must be related to my family somehow because she must have said a good five or six times "Should have looked at it yesterday". OKAY! I GET IT! I am a very bad mother. Do you know how many times a day the boy falls off of something or jumps off of something and isn't hurt? Too many to count! But sure, drop a pencil and suddenly I have to wonder if social services is going to be paying me a visit.

Long story short, there is nothing else to do at this point. We don't need for him to be seen by a doctor unless the spot gets infected. So we put Frank's medical bag of tricks away, give Michael some ice cream and I notice that Frank is quite irritated. When I ask what's wrong he announces that he is going down to that school tomorrow and lodging a complaint about the teacher. He'll stay in the office until he speaks to the whole chain of command and they know that he's pissed. Remember that scene from "It's a Wonderful Life" when George comes home on that fateful Christmas Eve and Zuzu is sick? He gets the teacher on the phone and gives her a piece of his mind? Well, that scene was playing in my head as my husband ranted and raged around the house. I almost asked him to check his pockets for Zuzu's petals, but didn't think he'd find me amusing at that particular moment. Maybe later.

Luckily by this morning, things had cooled down and there was no smack-down in the school office. We only have two days of school left with this particular teacher and I, for one, am glad. This is the same assistant teacher who sent Michael home 17 minutes after he arrived at school because of his coughing. If you hate kids so much, why be a teacher? There's a good question for you.

Dear Miss Manners...

Dear Miss Manners,

I believe myself to be a good conversationalist. I am witty and fairly intelligent. I am by no means living the most exciting life, but my days are always eventful. Why is it then, that whenever I pick up the phone and willingly make a long distance call to my mom and sister's home (they live together) they carry on conversations with one another (sometimes mom will even talk to her dog) while I am on the line! I listen to their ramblings about their days - from furniture shopping to dog's peeing on the floor - yet when it is my turn to talk about my day, they tune me out as if I'm not speaking at all! There is literally dead air at times.

So Miss Manners, how does one address such inconsiderate behavior and why, oh why, am I going up there to visit them?

Sincerely,
Long Distance Loser

Friends and Kids

When you become a mom, one of the things that keeps you sane is making friends with other moms. It gets even better if those friends have kids the same age as your own kids. I have been blessed many,many times with this scenario. But sometimes, it's not all play-dates and candy, you know?

Back when Nick was around 4, we made friends with a family who had a 4 year old son and we would get together all the time and play. The problem? Their 4 year old had a violent streak and when I found the boys out in the yard with Nick turning blue while this other child had his hands around his throat, we said bye-bye. Fast. Not all relationship troubles are this dramatic.

Did you ever just not LIKE someone's kid? Did you ever see the episode of "Everybody Loves Raymond" where Ray and Debra make friends with this great couple but their son is completely out of control and makes Ray crazy? Admit it, we've all had one or two relationships just like that. Without wanting to lose the adult end of the relationship, what do you do? How can you be friends with someone when their child makes you completely insane? On Friday, I was with one such friend whose daughter just rubs me the wrong way. It has been that way since day one and I will tell you why...the child has no respect what-so-ever for the adults around her - not her parents, her grandparents, or other adults. Now, don't get me wrong, I KNOW that my children can grate on other people's nerves (they do on mine every day!), but I am sensitive to this fact and am a firm believer with kids playing with kids while adults hang out and talk to adults.

But back to Friday, I am with this family and wanted to speak to the mom privately for a moment and her pre-teen daughter automatically comes too. This is an everday occurance and she is told everyday to go away. I snapped. Literally and figuratively, I snapped. I said "This is a conversation between your mother and me. Not every conversation involves you!" I said it in front of other people and clearly I was in the wrong BUT, for crying out loud, why should it get to that point? Why, when you are told everyday NOT to do something, would you keep doing it? I don't get it! I understand that pre-teen is another word for completely clueless, but when is enough enough? Is there ever a good time to tell a friend "Hey, your kid is really and truly pissing me off." I had been pondering this conversation for quite a while when my friend approached me today to tell me how much it bothered her that I snapped at her child on Friday.

(Insert door of opportunity here)

So I listened to her end of the story and she was very gracious and let it be known that she was embarassed and upset by my outburst and that her daughter did not like me very much right now. Please, someone, grab the knife from my hand before I hurt myself! But seriously, She went on for about 5 minutes saying her peace and then...you know me, I had mine. Nicely. So I was loud? HELLO! Anyone who knows me knows that I speak very loudly. I am the sounding bell at all of the homeschool meetings because no one is louder than me. So I said it in front of other people? Okay, that was wrong. But I told her all of the ways that this child disrespects ME and that I had been pushed to my limit. I apologized, I said that I would apologize to the child but then I said that I would expect an apology in return for this child's attitude. She's a 12 year old child, not a grown up and does not need to be involved in every adult conversation. If I am hanging out with their family, it is for the adult conversation - which we all need - not the toned-down, G-rated crap that has to be spoken when there is a child around! I do not inflict my children's presence on every adult that I sit down with. I don't think it's polite to the other adults and children need to realize that they are not our equals - yet. They are indeed, children.

So how did this whole afterschool special end? We're cool. We talked. The offensive child was not there so it was all said without interruption. We thought it was great that we could clear the air and I kind of feel like I need to remove myself from this child's presence for a little while - so that I do not offend.

Can you imagine?

And the Answer Is...Turkey Chili (who knew?)

Okay, live and learn. That is my new motto. Six weeks on the Disney Diet and I am still learning what the heck to do to get my digestion back on track and lose weight. The answer: Turkey Chili. I don't know why this tasty treat has worked such wonders but it has. I make it myself, it's quick and easy and low-fat, AND it satisfies.

Here's my quick recipe:

1 pound lean ground turkey breast
1 can dark red kidney beans (drained)
1 can black beans (drained)
2 cans chopped tomatoes w/green chiles
1 cup salsa
3 bell peppers (1 red, 1 green, 1 yellow) diced
1 medium onion chopped
1 heaping tablespoon minced garlic
1-2 tablespoons chili powder

In a non-stick pan (sprayed with cooking spray) add garlic and onion. Sautee for 2 minutes. Add turkey (breaking up with a wooden spoon as it cooks) and chili powder. When turkey is almost done, add remaining ingredients. Cover and simmer on low for 1 hour. Divide up in to 4 - 5 containers for quick lunches. I top mine with some shredded cheese for a little extra flavor. Very yummy.

Enjoy!

Evil Triumphs Once Again

Personally, I am tired of icky people getting away with things that decent people would be punished for. Again, I know that God says that vengeance is His, but...well, you know my feelings on that one.

The icky person in question is my sister's boyfriend. He did not get kicked out of school or have anything bad happen to him for blowing off his shift at the hospital for a weekend away. Would you seriously want this guy to treat you? I know I wouldn't.

Another icky person in action today is my now ex-stepfather. When my mom left him he refused to let her take most of her possessions - even though she had a police escort. As they battled things out in court over who got what and all that nonsense, he told the court that he threw away all of her belongings. Now, I'm not just talking about clothes, pictures, and that sort of stuff (although they were included), I'm talking about personal items such as jewelry from her grandmother and letters from her father who passed away when she was 18...I mean, what kind of a sick person does that? (Insert picture of crazy ex-stepfather here). A few days after the divorce was granted, this man calls my mother up and says that he'll SELL her her belongings! Now the common person's first response is that this man CLEARLY perjured himself on the stand - but there were no witnesses to him comment. So mom decides to talk to him and see what he'd sell her and for how much. He wants all of the jewelry back that he gave her over their 20-year relationship. Personally, I'd hand it all over in a second and be rid of the jerk - well, unless I sold it all already and treated myself to something pretty.

These are the kind of sick, icky people that float around in the perimeter of my life. I thank God everyday that I don't have to be around them. It makes me sick that these people get away with bad behavior, abusing the systems and get to walk away free and clear.

No conscience.

The Myth of More

Growing up, we always lived in a big home. We always had the best back yard with an in the ground swimming pool and my dad always drove the newest luxury cars. Until I was 10 years old. That was the year my parents split up. We had to sell the big, beautiful house and move in to an apartment. Still, it was the biggest model in the complex - 3 bedrooms. We moved a couple of more times after that, but never again did we have the kind of luxury I experienced in those first ten years.

I have lived in this same house now for almost 13 years. It's small. It's really small. It's really, really small. There are days that I long for space. Every now and again I get the comment from different family members, "Can't you move?" or "Wouldn't you be happier with more room?" The answer is yes to both of those things. Sure, we could move to a house that's a little bit bigger but in all honesty, moving is a lot of work and I have to really think about why we'd be doing it. Has anyone ever died from sharing a room with a sibling? Probably not. Has anyone truly gone insane from sharing one bathroom? Possibly (there have been days!). I think that for us, we are doing okay, we're not thrilled to be here, but we're okay. We don't have secure/guaranteed incomes and we each never gave a thought to the importance of credit way-back-when but in all honesty, it wouldn't have mattered.

You see, my standard response to the family members that ask us why we don't move to someplace bigger is "Did having a big house make your marriage any better?" (considering that the 3 that would ask this are all twice divorced, the answer is always 'no'). That normally keeps them quiet for a while. My dad moved to Boca mainly because of the social status that gave him. He works his deli 7 days a week alone because he cannot afford to hire or keep help because of the cost of living in such a place. My sister was looking at million dollar homes to rent. MILLION dollars. There are three people living in the home. I can't wrap my brain around it. We watched so many friends lose their homes to foreclosure or have to sell to downsize due to layoffs and whatnot. I don't want to live that way. Neither of us are big career people. I'd rather have my husband home on the weekends. I'd rather be able to go on a vacation once a year that is paid in full (and not on a credit card). So many marriages fail because of financial strain. I don't see the point. If we go in to debt because of medical bills or something of that nature, I could stand it. But to go in to debt for a second bathroom is just not worth it.

It all comes down to wants and needs. There will always be things that I want. But I thank God every day that He has met all of my needs.

My Disney Diet - Day 40

Day 40? Yikes! I think the last time I stuck to a diet for this long was when Nick was a baby and I joined Weight Watchers with my dad when we were still up in NY (men drop weight faster than women and I stuck it out because I coudn't stand to hear him gloat and wanted to out-last him - and I did). I am impressed.

Okay, so after finding out that some women have trouble digesting ingredients in diet-type foods (low-cal/sugar-free/fat-free) and find themselves bloated from them, I kind of cut them out this week and ate all foods that I cooked - just low-fat. And you know what, I got on the scale this morning and found that I had lost 2 pounds since Thursday! OMG! I am less bloated and I feel like my digestive system is acting normally again. What a relief, let me tell you! And yesterday when I was at work, I actually ate a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup pack (I had one cup before lunch and one in the mid afternoonJ). I am feeling so good right now, you cannot imagine!

I'm thinking about bathing suits, friends. I need to get a bathing suit. Choices are slim out there right now but the pool at the Grand Floridian at Disney just looks too amazing to skip! Because I had never wanted to get in to a bathing suit before, I never gave one much thought. But if I can keep up this momentum in to September, I am so going to WANT to walk around in a bathing suit. That hasn't happened in like...20 years! Woo-hoo! You know what's weird about doing a Disney trip without the kids? I actually go swimming. Every trip that my sister and I have taken together, we go swimming. When I go with Frank and the boys? We never even go near the pool. How odd is that?

So, just to re-cap (because I'm feeling sassy this morning), I am down to 157 pounds (that's 11 pounds off since the beginning) and I have lost a total of -
1 1/2 inches in my waist, 1 inch in my hips, 1 inch in my bust, 1 inch in my arms, and 2 inches in each of my thighs! Keep thinking thin, my friends!

Kicking down the barrier...

Sound the trumpets...drum roll please...I have finally broken down a weight loss barrier that has been killing me for a good long time. I got past the 160 mark. True, it only went one point below that but I SO needed that little victory. I am now at a total of 9 pounds lost and 6 inches total body. Yea, me!

I got back on track with my eating yesterday and was good today too. I'm well on my way to slim!

Think thin, everyone!

I Say What I Mean & Mean What I Say...Duh!

I am a horrific liar. I mean, I CAN lie, I just don't do it well. I know, I know, I shouldn't lie no matter what but...well, stuff happens.

My extended family is FULL of professional- quality liars. My mom while married to her second husband, had to lie all the time to keep the peace in her home. She would call us and then lie to her husband about it, she would sneak out to meet us, then lie about it. Blab my true feelings about my sister and then lie about it - you get the point. My dad has had a fairly severe drug problem for most of my life. I can literally remember brushing the cocaine off of his lapels at my sister's engagement party and yet he swears that he doesn't do drugs. He also doesn't drink. (Insert long, painful pause with look of utter disbelief here). My sister lies just for the sake of lying. Affairs? Never happened. Drug use? Not anymore. It's really almost comical.

Since moving away from the family almost 13 years ago, I have TRIED to say exactly what I mean when I am talking to them. If I am invited someplace and do not want to go, I tell them the reason why (or most of the reason - sometime's there's just no need to be nasty). If I don't like something, I say it. I'm the nerd of the family. I was never a drinker (except for a brief 6-month period when I was 19), I was never a smoker and I never did any kinds of drugs. I watched what they did to my father and sister and never wanted that for myself. I didn't see the appeal. They all know me to be a Christian, they know I go to church, they know that I am faithful to my husband and yet, they always question everything that I say, as if I am lying. Man is that annoying.

Case in point, I'm on the phone with my dad on Father's Day and I tell him how I am going to be in NY when he is next month. "Why?" he asked. "So that I can see you," I reply. "No, seriously, why are you going to be there?" Sigh. "Seriously," I say, "I thought it would be nice if we could all be together for a night." "No, come on, you have something else planned up there for the weekend, don't you?" At this point, I wish that I did. "Seriously, Dad, I'm just coming up to see everyone for the weekend, nothing else." "Oh."

Oh. That's it. Not even an excited "oh", just an oh. I guess the fact that I wasn't lying and really had nothing else better to do was a big let-down for him. I guess it's all okay. I know who I am and the wackier they behave just gives me more writing material for you guys.

Hunger Strikes - My Disney Diet Day 36

And by hunger strikes I don't mean "I vow not to eat until blah, blah, blah". No, I mean more like I am hungry again all the daggone time! What is up with that? This whole past weekend was one big attempt to NOT eat everything in sight. I don't like this feeling. It stinks.

The weird thing is that I have maintained the 8 pound weight loss (even with the over-eating this weekend) but all of my clothes still fit exactly the same. The reason? Puffiness. Bloating. All-around ickiness. I did some research on this subject and apparently a small percentage of women have trouble digesting some of the ingredients in sugar-free/fat-free foods! Why not put a bullet in my big fat stomach right now because apparently even eating right is not going to make that sucker go away! Being the queen of all-things-weird-illnesses, you KNOW that I had to fit in to that category. It is just not fair! NO FAIR!

But I am trudging on. On Sunday, I ate like a normal person. Well, with the exception of that brownie for lunch, I ate like a normal person. I did eat a single Suzi Q that night BUT I washed it down with SKIM milk. Ha! Yesterday was weird. I ate my normal breakfast (A whole grain Bagelful. Only 180 calories. Yummy). To celebrate Nick getting his permit, we got Chinese for lunch. I stuck to my old Weight Watchers thinking and got the chicken with broccoli and white rice. And yes, I ate it all. I even caved and had a can of coke. Dinner was an absolute disaster. Keep in mind, I don't do pasta. It never makes me feel good and I never crave it, but the family loves it. Well, last night I ate a rather full plate of spaghetti with a large piece of garlic bread and a spinach salad. Do you see the madness? To compensate for it all, I did exercise a lot yesterday. I did a 50 minute walk in the morning (burned 525 calories), did a 28-minute workout to my Power 90 DVD (bured around 100 calories) and then after the spaghetti-paloooza, I walked for another 50 minutes (higher intensity, burned 550 calories). So I did TRY to make up for all that I ate yesterday. I still feel puffy today.

So what am I learning for my Disney trip? A.) Stay away from the pasta. Pasta equals puffiness and we don't like puffy. B.) Suzi Q's are not my friend. Stay away from the cakes (no matter how yummy they are or how cute they are shaped like a Disney character). And finally, C.) Just because it's sugar free, doesn't make it your friend either. Eat what you normally like, just in much smaller quantities.

Words to live by, ladies.

Beware! Teen Driver Ahead!

Well, it took a year and a half and two tries, but Nick now has his permit. He is now legally allowed to drive. Yikes! I didn't know that such a person even existed - one who did not count down the days until he could drive, one who had to have his mother DRAG him to the DMV to take the test; one, who even now will not get behind the wheel of the darn car!

I guess I should be thankful, it could be worse. He could want to drive ALL the time ( I don't think my nerves could handle it). So be careful, my fellow drivers. Some day soon my boy may be driving through your neighborhood.

Be safe, my friends. Be safe.

Father's Day - Two Thumbs Down

I had such high hopes for today. I got up after a good night's sleep, took care of some things around the house and woke Frank up a little after 9 am. I had a special breakfast to make and was excited to do it. I should have known when I poured bad milk in to the egg mixture (I did catch that little fact BEFORE I added it to the pan) that it would be all down hill from there.

Fight number one: Nick was going to church with his girlfriend and her family and he looked like a mild train wreck. "Fix his hair!" Frank yelled at me. So I take the 16-year old in to the bathroom and attempt to do something with his head. It is a lost cause and the child whines and complains the entire time. When I mention that he has some kind of goo in his eye, he snaps "Oh for God sake just worry about the hair!" Down went the brush and I was done. Go out looking like an idiot, I don't care.

Fight number two: While getting ready to go out, hygiene habits of the teenager come up. I explain them to Frank and add "Don't say anything because it will come out like an attack. We'll talk about it later." So what happens? Frank goes out in to the living room like some sort of crazed soldier going in to battle and says ALL of the things to the boy that I just asked him not to. Voices are raised and feelings are hurt. I was not amused.

Fight number three: We're at the mall so that Frank can get himself a good wallet. He normally gets one at Walmart but wanted a sturdier one this time. We explained to the children before leaving home that we were not buying THEM anything at the mall, it was all about dad. Twenty minutes in, we find ourselves on line at the bungee jump for Michael ($10) and Nick is at the game store looking for new games for himself. Since we were clearly going to spend the money on Michael to bungee jump (which was WAY cool), I told Nick that I'd give him $10 to get what he wanted. Not good enough. He wanted $20. Not gonna happen, we tell him and he walks off in a snit.

Fight number four: I left the three of them in Barnes and Noble so that I could go to Archiver's for scrapbooking supplies (I had a coupon) and apparently Frank did not like the way the sales guy was hovering and watching them so he demands that they all leave and walks out of the store in a snit. The teenager is embarrassed and could not understand what the big deal was. A twenty minute discussion takes place in the car and ends with "Well, I guess you'll never have to go anywhere with me again, then!" This, surprisingly, coming from the adult.

Fight number five: We sit down to dinner and Michael complains that his chair is wobbly. Our kitchen set is pretty old and all of the chairs are on their way out. So Frank tells him that he'll look at it after dinner, and Nick (Unable to sit by and not speak) says "Well, what do you expect, they're old". A true statement, sure, but said with just a touch of snottiness that makes Frank's head explode. Next thing I know, Frank stands up and kicks his chair out from under himself and yells "Well then I guess YOU can go out and buy the damn furniture!" and storms off. Now I've got a $50 meal on the table and I'll be damned if people are going to walk off and not eat it. So I call him back to the table and demand that he eat and then tell everyone to just SHUT IT! No more talking!

It's now almost 9:30 at night and I, for one, will be very thankful when this day comes to an end. Oh, Happy Father's Day.

When Bad Things Happen to Bad People (hee-hee!)

There are people out there in the world that lie, cheat and steal and nothing bad ever happens to them. We ask God why, and our told that vengence in His. But don't you just wish that sometimes you could actually SEE someone get what's coming to them? I know that's not the attitude we're supposed to have, but that icky side just comes out once in a while.

Like today.

Right now we are awaiting news about a certain liar and how he has potentially messed up his schooling that he is paying for right now by being irresponsible and blowing off work to go and have lobster and sex filled weekend. THAT would be funny.

I'll keep you posted.

Back Where They Belong

I am watching a fabulous scene right now. I am watching my 16 year old and his oldest friend sit and watch TV with my 8 year old nearby. This is a scene that just makes me smile. Nick and Alex have known each other since the age of 5. They were almost inseperable until the age of around 14 when Alex got a girlfriend and Nick became a jerk who could not tolerate this girl horning in on his friendship.

For two years I had to sit back and watch new friends come in to my home but none of them measured up to our beloved Alex. He truly is an exceptional boy and except for his lack of judgement during his relationship with this girl (he gave up much to please her every whim), we have never found a fault with him. He was the measuring stick by which all Nick's friends were measured (and NONE of them came close). In the last couple of months, the boys have re-aquainted themselves and it is like stepping back in time. Today, we went to the game store and bought a video game that they used to play when they were 8. They played this game today for hours and just laughed like two loons. It was a joy to watch.

It's always good to have friends. It's good to surround yourself with many different kinds of people. But it is a true gift to have a best friend who - no matter how much time passes - you can still just sit down and be silly with. I am thankful that my son has received such a gift.

Some Pep in my Step

So I got up this morning and went about my usual routine of getting the boy ready for school, waking Frank up time and time again, all the while wishing that I was still asleep. It's Friday, it's my day off. I was thinking about putting off my treadmill time until later but then I took a detour to the bathroom where the scale stared me down.

"All right! I get it! I haven't gotten on you this week!" I scream in my head. So I strip and step on. And guess what? I lost another TWO pounds! That puts the official weight loss at 8 pounds and 5 inches total body. WOO-HOO! I cannot believe it. And that was WITH the McDonald's yesterday. So needless to say I threw on my walking clothes and my CD player and walked with a big smile because I feel motivated. Over the next 2 1/2 days I will need to walk off another 1100 calories in order to have walked off one pound this week and that's not including the cut in calories this week.

Oh, I'm so excited!

In Praise of the Purifier

Michael has allergies. Always has, and he always will. He was born with a whole protein allergy which made feeding him rather difficult. It took over 3 weeks before the doctors figured out how to help him. He outgrew that one but now has a list of others. We've been through several doctors and emergency appointments when his coughing/wheezing got to be too much and we were always treated as if we were crazy. Last week just about did me in.

We had an appointment today with the pediatrician but we went to the Brier Creek location where they specialize in allergies. I cannot believe what a difference it has made. The fine doctor spent all of 10 minutes with us but managed to hit the nail right on the head and I can say with pure glee, it is a QUIET night in our home. Michael's been on Singulaire for over 6 months and while it does okay, it does not deal with this cough that comes around every 3-4 months. Doctor wonderful said to keep giving him the Singulaire, add a Zyrtec and a prescription nasal spray to help with the symptoms. So, okay, it seems a little excessive but, hey, what do I know. As we are leaving his office he adds "Put an air purifier in his bedroom." Okay, thanks!

We came home today and cleaned/decluttered his room, washed all of the bedding and installed the purifier. I have not heard a peep out of him. No coughing, no sneezing, no wheezing, no complaining, it's like a miracle. Now he did use the Singulaire and Zyrtec but not the nasal spray so that can be a contributing factor, but let me tell you, my vote is with the purifier. I put that baby on and closed his doors in his room for about 4 hours before he went back in there. It even SMELLS better in there!

Can I get a hallelujah chorus?

My Disney Diet - Day 31 (and a dilema)

Okay, I'm out of the funk that I was in on the last two Disney Diet posts. I've got my groove back and am feeling good. Eating less is becoming easier - I even had McDonald's for lunch today and was able to eat less of it and still be satisfied. I spoke on the phone TWICE while on the treadmill and was able to maintain a conversation without gasping for air. Yea, me! I didn't get on the scale this week yet; I don't know why.

So here's my dilema. The weight is coming off slowly, as I've mentioned before. I was feeling okay about that. But now with the possibility of going up to NY next month and seeing all of the people who have given me my poor body image complex, I want to push the numbers a bit and am unsure how. Maybe by not eating McDonald's - who knows! My ideal goal would be to lose 10 pounds in the next 36 days. Is that reasonable? I don't know. Is it doable? Sure, maybe in the bizzaro world. I am unwilling to do the starvation thing. I am not really doing all of this for THEM, I am doing this really for me and my own peace of mind. To know that I can be with these people and feel good about me. Somewhere there's a therapist just waiting to get me on the couch! I guess it can be viewed both ways. I'm doing this for them so that they will look at me different which, in essence, is also for me so that they will not look at me and tell me how fat I am! How strange is that that I even have to do all of this! It's madness, I tell you!

So I walked 70 minutes on the treadmill today. I bought little, tiny 2 pound weights that I used for a portion of the walk. I even added a small incline for a little while (and boy was THAT hard!). I'm mixing it up, trying to work the total body. Who knows, maybe it is not my destiny to be thin. I hope that's not the case. I'm seriously not looking to be a size 5 again, but to be and 8 or a 10 would be very nice.

Oh, My Many Hats

I am a daughter. I am a sister. I am a granddaughter, I am an aunt. I am a wife. I am a mother. I am a friend. For one person, that's a lot of titles. Sometimes the roles that go with these titles battle with one another and cause great distress.

While on the phone with my sister tonight, I was invited to come up to NY for a weekend in July. My dad will be in town, several aunts and uncles that I missed seeing at the last big family shin-dig will be around again - along with some new ones who weren't there the last time. Karen is offering to buy me a plane ticket to get me up there. My initial reaction (as a sister) is "Yes!". Then my mind goes to work. The daughter in me says "No". My dad is always nice to me in front of witnesses, but as soon as no one is within earshot, he will insult me and make me feel bad about myself. The granddaughter in me would love to see my aging grandmother. She has been ill for so long and I have no idea when the Lord will call her home and so any time that I see her would be a gift. The mother in me could use a weekend away!

The wife in me is having the biggest struggle. My husband does not want me to go because he knows how many times I have come home from a family visit in tears. He will not be there with me and he knows that it would be painful for him to have to sit and hold me if I come home broken again. I do not wish to cause my husband any pain and so there is a part of me that has to say no to the trip. The other side of me is begging to say yes. I want Frank to have faith in me that I can do this on my own. That I can go and that no one will hurt me because I know better and that I will know that nothing that they say can hurt me. I want him to feel joy for me at the thought of spending time with people that I love and to give me the confidence that I need to do it.

It shouldn't be this hard. There should be joy and excitement at seeing loved ones, not planning, pleading and plotting how to survive it. Which hat will I wear to make my final descision? Which one is right? I still don't know. I will have to try each one on over the next couple of days and see which one feels right.

My Disney Diet - Day 28

Day 28. Twenty-eight days. Four weeks. Sigh. In my fantasy diet life, I would be down 28 pounds by now and would have WON a trip to Disney for my efforts.

Stupid real life.

But seriously, I'm at day 28 and while the numbers are dropping slowly, I am noticing some changes in me and my eating habits. For example, two double-stuff oreo's equal a serving. By eating just these two cookies I A.) Do not get heartburn and B.) I am satisfied. In my old eating habits, it would have taken 6 or 8 cookies to satisfy me and they would have had to have been washed down with a tall glass of milk. In my cooking I have learned that not everything needs to be sauteed in butter. True, it is yummier that way, but I have gotten creative with my seasonings and I am still enjoying my meals. Huh. I have come to realize that drinking soda does not really quench my thirst. But oh, does it taste good going down. Mmm...

So how is this preparing me for my trip? Okay, we've established that I do not have to drink so much soda while roaming the parks. This saves me money and keeps me better hydrated. Yea! I am learning that I do not have to eat SO much to satisfy my appetite - this too, will help my wallet on the trip. We are on the dining plan but now appetizers are not included. This was causing me great distress because I am a huge fan of all-things-appetizers. Now I can look at the great selection of entrees that are offered and not be looking longingly for more. Go Stace! And finally, I will not have to massacre the chilled-butter Mickey that some of the restaurants are famous for. I can let him sit and watch us eat, slowly melting at his own pace without me carving in to him to slather on to my dinner roll. Ha!

I don't get on the scale again until Wednesday. I don't feel a whole lot of difference but I think that this is like I had said in an earlier post - this point in the diet is like that 13 minute hump I had to get over on the treadmill. It takes time. I am learning to eat better and make smarter choices. All in all, I'm okay.

Meet the Parents

So it happened today. Sigh. We met the parents. We drove Nick over to his girlfriend's house and Frank and I actually went in and spent time with her parents. It was a spur of the moment type of thing, but there we were, sitting and talking. For two hours!

I kind of feel like this is some initiation into adulthood. I admit, that at times I still refuse to believe that I am an adult who has a 16 year old son - I'm too young for that! But today, sitting there with these people and discussing the fact that we do not want our children having sex with one another - well, that sort of clinches the deal. We are adults now. It was sort of like seeing an R-rated movie for the first time; you feel a couple of inches taller and know that you will never be the same. That's how I feel right now. We've crossed the line to where we no longer talk about innocent things like recipes and movie reviews, we talk about stopping our children from jumping in to bed together. Oy.

I don't want to grow up!

They were very nice people and we will most likely be having dinner with them very soon. And don't get me wrong, we didn't spent the ENTIRE two hours discussing ways to discourage the kids from sex, but it was there. The men had a lot in common and seemed to have no trouble talking - which was odd to me because I am normally the chatty one in the group. The mom and I had to dig a little bit more to talk, but I just think that she is shy. Frank and I are so loud and booming in our voices and presense that we probably shocked these poor people. The good news is that the like our son. A lot. They see him as being a good influence on their daughter. huh, who knew! They enjoy having him around and love including him in all of their family activities. This, as most of you will understand, was such a blessing for me to hear after all of the negative crap I've taken from 'the circle' and their parents. These people seemed completely normal. They're Christians and they don't mince words. They admit to their child's negative behaviors (although I have yet to see a bad trait in that girl) and understand that these kids (Nick and their daughter) are normal and not doing anything that should be labelled as "not right with God". PRAISE THE LORD!

I'm feeling pretty peppy right now about the whole thing. I've grown up and been encouraged today. I'm not such a heinous parent after all. Can you believe it?

I'll Meet You in Homeroom

Remember the times when you were a girl in high school and you couldn't wait to meet up with your friends between classes, in homeroom, or at lunch? All of the silly conversations that were centered around who's dating who? What they did? What everyone is wearing? All the cool places you were going that weekend? Most of us miss those days, but not me! No, I'm living those days EVERY day whether I want to or not. I don't even really participate in these conversations, but I listen and nod and make a non-commital type of comment when needed.

"Do you know where they're going today? A picnic in the park."

"Do you know where they went for dinner last night? It was very late. I bet she paid."

"Do you know where they just went? I can't believe that she had to take him there!"

It's always the same. Every day there is a drama and it makes me realize how thankful I am for the 600 miles between us and the fact that I have more important things to do with my life than getting sucked in to this insane soap opera of life on Long Island. I guess that this is what happens when you have multi-generations living in one house. My mom - who is recently divorced (Praise God!) - has not re-established her own life yet so her main form of entertainment is watching and talking about my sister's life. And while, yes, it can be entertaining to listen to, there are just days that I want to scream "WHO CARES??" I have learned my lesson and do not give in to the urge to commisserate with her or offer my own disgust of the situation - that one came back and bit me on the ass one too many times. Now I just try to let her vent. But honestly, enough already! We all know what a creep this guy is, and we all know that my sister does not see it, so all we can do is sit back and wait.

Some days, I feel like I'm reading a note that was slipped to me under the desk in class. The only difference is that, as an adult, I was hoping for a bit more 'mature' conversation. It's not as fun at 40 as it was at 16.

Bummer.

Where? Nowhere

Week four on the treadmill. My pace is up, my time on the mill is up but according to some research, the treadmill is getting me nowhere. No kidding. I shared this information with friend (and co-dieter) and she thought it was hysterical. "Well, of course you're getting nowhere, you're on a treadmill!" Ha, ha, very funny. I get it. I'm in my room, not going anywhere. BUT...according to this research the treadmill is an okay workout but it will not help me achieve my long-term weight loss goals.

???

So you mean I am sweating my patooty off for nothing? And I have to be honest, I disagree with this so-called 'research'. While I am walking, I may physically BE in my room - which, by the by, I thank God every day that my husband finally painted the room before I started this endeavor - but in my mind, I am in different places throughout the workout.

I told you all about my disco-assortment, so when I'm 2.8ing it along to "I Say a Little Prayer", I can actually see myself singing it with my friends (and yes, we're in the restaurant scene from "My Best Friends Wedding"). At the 3.0 level of "Dancing on the Ceiling", I am back at SUNY Westbury in a kickline competition back in 1987. "New Attitude" at 3.2 also has me at SUNY but back in 1986 - and yes, I looked hot in my red and white uniform with pom-poms on my shoes. By the time I am up to 3.5 and "It's My Life" is rocking, no, I'm not making out with Jon Bon Jovi but I am in a gym practicing my boxing moves. A picture of whoever has annoyed me in the last day or so is usually on my invisible punching bag. This is a HUGE stress reliever. So, how can I be getting nowhere? It's just not possible!

Tomorrow morning when I throw on my sneakers and start up my treadmill, I will be celebrating the small victory of losing 6 pounds in 3 weeks and several inches total body. I will also applaud the fact that I am not sucking wind anymore until I am WAY into my workout. I may never leave the freshly-painted four walls of my bedroom, but luckily I have an active imagination and each morning finds me bee-bopping not only around the country but also time traveling.

Getting nowhere? I beg to differ.

* The above is my entry to the Scribbit June Write-Away Contest. For more information on this contest (or if you want to read a really good blog) go to http://scribbit.blogspot.com/search/label/contests.*

TGIF

I had the day off. I recently changed my work schedule so that I have Friday's off. Last Friday was glorious. Nick was at Busch Gardens, Michael was at school and Frank was work. I had the whole house to myself. Oh, it was so wonderful, there really are no words to describe it. That feeling was not to be repeated.

I woke up at 6:15 because Michael had school today. Unfortunately, he was still coughing up a lung so I decided to let him stay home. Now I'm awake when I do not have to be. I go on as I usually do on a weekday morning, Frank left for work, I walked on the treadmill, showered and started the laundry. I called the pediatrician to get Michael seen about his cough, I called Impressions to make an appointment to get my eyebrows waxed, fixed lunch, got ready and was on my way by 11:45. We spent 30 minutes at the doctor (Michael is fine), dropped his prescription off at the Walmart pharmacy, drove to the bank to do the store deposit, went to my bank to do my deposit, went to Impressions and spent 20 minutes there yacking and getting tortured with hot wax (but my eyebrows look fabulous), and then drove across the parking lot to the movie theater to see "Kung Fu Panda" (very funny). By the time we got out of there it was 3:45. We went to the Walmart and picked up the prescription and did a little food shopping, stopped off at the bookstore because Michael left some of his school work there yesterday. We didn't get home until around 5:30. My whole day was gone! I guess I should be thankful that I had the time off to do all of this but it sort of defeated the purpose of having a day off just for me. Oh, and the icing on my cake was that Nick did not do any of his chores. Again.

Thank God my sensitive husband had the good sense to not argue when I announced that I wanted Chinese food for dinner.

TGIF

Sure, But Can You Walk On Water?

Every once in a while Frank and I will get in to a ridiculous fight. I think that most fights are ridiculous, but sometimes they are necessary. This morning's fight was not.

I sleep with the fan going 365 days a year - no breaks. I am always hot when I sleep. Frank is a smoker. Fifteen years ago our pediatrician told him to stop smoking in the house because it was making Nick sick. So now he smokes outside - or tries to. These were the weapons used in this morning's "discussion". We were lying in bed, not wanting to get up, when Frank asked "Why do you leave the fan on when you're not here?" "Sometimes I forget", I reply. "No, you don't. Forgetting once in a while I can understand, but not everyday." Now in my defense, I don't normally shut the fan off until I do my final walk through before leaving for work. In his mind, once I am out of the bed, or off the treadmill the fan should go off. Now I'm a little defensive. "Oh, does that bother you?" I ask. "Yeah, it does," He says. The line in the sand has been drawn.

"You know what bothers me?" I ask, and before he can answer I say "Smoking in the house." "I haven't done that in MONTHS," he claims. Right, because I just imagine the smell of smoke coming under the bedroom door. Okay. Sure. "You know what else I hate?" I ask (because now I'm on a roll) "I hate that you have that last cigarette right before coming to bed and then you come to bed all smelling of smoke and then cough for a solid five minutes. THAT'S annoying." Keep in mind that during all of this, no one has raised their voice. "You're already awake when I get in here." He says. "Yes I am," I say, "Because of all the smoke." At this point we both look at eachother and laugh because we realize how stupid this all is. Bottom line, he's going to smoke, I'm going to use the fan. Frank was expecting me to admit that I screwed up with the fan thing and that I would promise to never do it again, he did not expect me to come back at him with something that HE does wrong - because he does not believe that he has faults that annoy anyone. In his mind, the things that he does is trivial to the crimes the rest of the family commits. Hardly. I often ask him when he goes on these rants about what the rest of us do wrong "What's it like to walk on water?"

He gets the point.

Numbers

I suck at math. Always have, always will. Dieting is nothing but one long math problem that never seems to end. I stared this diet at the awful number of 168. I had 125 days to lose 25 pounds. I have to burn or eliminate 3500 calories a week to lose 1 pound. I walk (now) for 45 minutes a day to burn around 400 calories, even at 7 days a week I am only burning 2800 calories through the walking. That leaves me to eliminate a minimum of 700 calories to lose that 1 stinking pound. I am awake an average of 17 hours a day where I am supposed to eat only 1800 calories in order to lose weight. My breakfast bar has 120 calories, my lunch (the frozen variety) tends to consist of around 230 calories. My fat-free pudding has 90 calories. Dinner has too many calories to figure out! I mean, I don't have a scale so I am unsure if I am eating 4 oz. of meat or not. I do measure my 1/2 cup of rice/pasta/side dish and I load up on the veggies. Does the fact that I no longer drink 300 calories a day in soda still count even though I cut that out more than 3 weeks ago?

Since the beginning of this adventure (some 24 days ago), I have lost 6 pounds (I'm now 163) and 4 inches off of my total body. I listen to an average of 10 songs on my CD player while walking. I now have 4 CD's to chose from - I'm incredibly fickle with my disco in the morning. I walk at 2.8 mph for the first song, increase to 3.0 mph for one sone, increase to 3.2 for one song, then do 3.4 for atleast 2 songs. Now I'm up to 3.5 for atleast 2 songs and then go down the scale again until my 10 songs are done. I then drink 2 glasses of water to make a dent in my 8 daily glasses of water. I curse atleat 5 times throughout the day as I run to the bathroom to pee!

Numbers, numbers, everywhere!

My Disney Diet - Day 23

I'm getting lazy. Not with the exercising, but with the eating. Monday night I caved and ate a fried chicken cutlet - and not a small one! Yesterday I ate a Three Musketeers bar and had 5 perogies with dinner! Tonight I am making pasta with meat sauce and I don't plan on eating only 1 cup! What is up? We are in week 4 of this thing and I'm getting a little too laid back. I have lost a whopping total of 5 pounds which isn't a bad thing - taking it off slow is better - but I would really, really, REALLY like to see the numbers drop a little bit more on the scale. My goal by this point in time was to have dropped 6 pounds. The goal is 2 pounds a week until Disney. Is this one of those diet-humps that I have to get over? But how? I eat my Special K breakfast or my 100 calorie coffee cake, I eat a Lean Cuisine/Smart Ones/Healthy Choice for lunch with a snack cup of fat-free pudding, I drink 8 glasses of water a day and then I try to eat a sensible dinner. Or I was until this week. I walk off 400 calories on average a day. Last week I actually walked off 3500 calories - which equals a pound. But I did really good with my eating last week! There should have been more numbers off the scale. Stupid scale. Maybe it's broken. Wouldn't that be nice.

So what's my motivation this week? How do I get over this hump? How do I still eat the things that I like, just less of them? It is a mystery, friends. One in which I don't have an answer to right now. I have to form a picture in my mind of someplace fabulous that I want to have my picture taken while at WDW and then picture how much better I'll look in it if I am thinner. This week's picture will be in front of "Finding Nemo". Picture it with me. The colors there are fabulous - and I look good in blue too!

Continue to pray for me and to think thin!

The Case of the Forgotten Grandchild

So I'm at work today and at around 10:45 my cell phone rings. Normally the only person who calls me on my cell at this time of day is my loving husband calling to either A.) complain that he has a headache and just needs me to talk to him until it goes away or B.) Just to say he loves me.

Awww....

But to my surprise, it was my dad! I didn't even realize that he KNEW my cell phone number! But that's not the point. I look at his name on the screen and have a slight panic attack because being that he never calls on the cell phone - or during the week for that matter - this cannot be good news. I have a customer at the desk and I ask her to excuse me for a moment while I take the call. "Stace!" he beams. "Did I give you Anthony's legos?" Huh, not bad news at all, just bizarre. "Yes, you did," I tell him. "Nine years ago." "Is he done with them?" he asks. "Why?" I want to know, still thinking that this is a strange question; what 16-year old still plays with Legos? "Kyla wants them. She loves legos and I figured if Nick was done with them, you could send them down. Or did I give them to Justin?" Justin being the first born/Messiah of the grandchildren. So many thoughts were running through my brain. First, isn't four years old a little young for Legos? Secondly, is he that cheap that he just can't go out and BUY the kid some new Legos? How many recycle cycles should a batch of Legos get? Thirdly, I didn't realize that girls even played with Legos. And finally, did he COMPLETELY forget that he has another grandchild - Michael - whom he purchased 14 different Lego sets for for Christmas?? I mean, I realize that Christmas was almost 6 months ago, but he has been buying Michael Legos for years! Again, I realize that maybe because Michael is the third grandchild and NOT a girl, that he may be easy to overlook - if you're senile. I'm offended for my child on so many levels, it's not even funny. So I inform him of this information and remind him of all the Lego kits that he just bought the child and how he loves them so. His response, "Oh."

Absence making the heart grow fonder clearly does not apply in this scenario.

Um...What DID you like?

Okay, ladies, fess up. When you met your husband's, did you do anything to 'change' him? Did you maybe buy him some decent clothes or a cologne that you like? Did you teach him to drink something that wasn't in a can? To use utensils? See, these are normal things, I believe. When I met Frank, he had his own apartment and in his refrigerator was nothing but condiments. Should cold-cuts ever arrive in his apartment, he was ready.

But have you ever known a couple where the woman COMPLETELY makes over the man? I find this hysterical. When my sister met husband number 2, he was a rather plain and simple man. He had a small house, he had a boat that he loved and he wore glasses. Within a year, the boat was gone, the glasses were gone and they were on the hunt for a better house. Okay, so what did you like about this man in the first place? I mean, looks aren't everything, right? When I met Frank he wore jeans and pocket t-shirts. This has not changed. He drank a little more and smoked a little more but those are the only things that have changed about Frank in 19 years. So why would you date someone if you had to change everything about them? This is a mystery to me. There are millions of people in the world, surely you could find someone who meets your standards more than the poor schmuck getting a make over! All of the effort going in to re-stocking his closet, taking him to a stylist, introducing him to foods that YOU like, this time and energy could be better spent just actually LOOKING for someone else who would suit your needs. My sister is in this mode with her current boyfriend. It's almost like playing dress up with a life-sized, icky Ken doll.

I have struggled with my weight my whole life. It's no big secret. When I met Frank, I wore a size 5. The first time he took me out to dinner I wore an outfit that was downright sexy and should not have been allowed out in public - mini skirt, tube top, bolero jacket, stilletto heals, you name it, I had it on. Now I am a size 12. No one wants to see me in any of those things and they are right. Not once in all of these years has Frank asked me to lose weight. He has not tried to convince me to slim down with the promise of something 'pretty' or 'sexy'. He loves me for me. It doesn't seem like that big of a deal to us to live this way, so why is it so hard for others?

Maybe instead of treating the liar to a new wardrobe, maybe she should treat him to councelling on how to stop being a liar. THAT would be a change that everyone could enjoy and money well spent.

My Disney Diet - Day 21

Okay, so we're at day 21 and I'm like, eh - no big whoop. I'm still feeling icky from the whole period thing and I've got another 2-3 days of that to go. I was pretty good all day eating-wise but I'm lacking that little umph I need to motivate me today. I walked like a wild woman all weekend long. I walked for 60 minutes on the treadmill on Saturday and 50 minutes on Sunday - all in one shot, no breaks. I was feeling pretty good about me, but today, not so much. I wanted to share with somebody - anybody - over the weekend about how I was doing but all of my friends were unavailable and because I'm such a neurotic freak, I refuse to tell any family members because then they'll try to out-do me. And they'll probably succeed. See, I'm just not myself right now. Hormones suck. All I can think about is how I want to make chicken parmigian for dinner and eat a LOT of it. With spaghetti. And garlic bread! Okay, maybe, just maybe I'll make a salad on the side.

Will I? Won't I? Who knows.

But on a lighter note, it's 105 days until Disney! I watched a show on the Food Network last night where they were competing with baking Pixar movie character cakes. It was pretty interesting and lucky for me, cake is not my thing so I was not in the least bit tempted. Seriously, still thinking about the chicken. As I watched the show it just made me long to be there running around 'the world' with no one to drag me down. I think I could seriously vacation there by myself and not feel in the least bit cheated.

Hey, while I'm in this 'happy-place' mode, maybe I ought to go and get on the mill and think bathing suits, not deep fried chicken!

Think thin!

Take my uterus...please!

I am going to be 40 this year. I have been dealing with my period since the age of 12. The PMS, the cramps, the cravings, the bloating, the need to kill somebody every 28 days, should be old news and yet, every month, it still amazes me that I have to deal with this. This month was no different. The person that I had the need to kill was my dear husband. When I woke up this morning and stated that I was indeed in pain and needed the ibuprofen before even rising from the bed, he asked, "Shouldn't you be used to this by now?"

(Insert "Psycho" theme here)

If he had said it with sympathy or perhaps WHILE he was handing me the pain killer, I probably could have over-looked it. But he said it in a tone that pretty much was like waving a red flag at a bull. Frank suffers from cluster migraines. His cluster cycle this last time lasted for almost 2 months with headaches sometimes hitting up to 3 times a day and lasting for 1 1/2 - 2 hours each. He's suffered from them for 30 years. So when the poor dear made his stupid comment this morning, I trudged past him and snarled, "Are you used to your headaches yet?"

He had to think for a moment before he made the connection. Bless his heart!