What's with the red?

Okay, so I get that red is one of the main colors for Christmas. It is also the main color for Valentine's Day. But what is with men and the color red? Seriously. Men think that red signifies something...sexy. If it's red and you are a woman wearing it, it's sexy.

SO NOT TRUE.

For the last two Christmas's there has been red nail polish and red lipstick in my stocking. No matter how many times I have explained how this all works to my sweet husband, he doesn't get it. Now, I admit, I DO have red nail polish. My toes are painted with it right now. It's the holidays and I am festive, so sue me. It is a basic red, nothing crazy. He tends to go for a 'deep' red which always looks kind of brown to me, but that's not the point. The thing is that I am very fair skinned, pale, as white as white can be, you know? Dark colors do not look good on me. Well, dark colored clothes - the RIGHT dark colored clothes look good on me. But on my fingers, toes and lips? Not so much with the dark colors. Red nail polish on my fingers tends to make me look a little ghoulish - you know, hands dripping in blood type of thing. Not attractive.

So I didn't want to be obvious in my dislike of this year's beauty gifts but clearly my face does not lie because once all of the gifts were opened and the kids were off playing, Frank was like "You can return those if you want" to which I feel bad. Even though I KNOW these colors will look heinous on me. So giving him the benefit of the doubt, yesterday we were getting ready to go shopping and I took the lipstick out and bravely put it on. I had barely touched my lips when I wanted to scream. I guess I said something out loud because he came walking in and sort of halted with a horrified look on his face and went "Oh". Yes, now he gets it.

Perhaps if I were a Victoria's Secret super model, this color would work; or maybe if I had ANY color in my face, it could work. But the lesson has been learned...Stace does NOT look good in the red colors. I'll keep my red toes for now but soon enough I will return to my natural colors, perhaps some corals and pinks, but no red. Never, never red!!!