Saturday, July 31, 2010

Anybody got a closet I can sit in??

I am slowly going insane.  Besides the obvious of Frank being out of work still, there is the whole aspect of him being here, near me, ALL THE TIME.  I wake up, there he is, I get up, there he is, I go from room to room and oh, look, THERE HE IS.

Some women don't mind this.  I have a friend who almost GUSHES when she talks about having her husband home for extended periods of time and for her I say "Yippee" for me, I'm like "Are you freakin kidding me?"  I started to cry the other day because I just needed to be alone.  I shared this with my loving husband and told him that I was going insane because of the lack of privacy.  So what does he do?  He knocks on the door while I'm in the bathroom to ask me some STUPID question that really didn't even need an answer right then and there!  So I'm thinking "Is he really this inconsiderate?" and I've come to the conclusion that yes, yes he is.

Today I BEGGED him to go out.  I didn't care where.  Just go.  Please.  Leave.  Just for a little while.  Did he?  No.  Is he doing things around here that need to be done?  Not particularly.  He did hang some shelves for me yesterday for my writing resources and whatnot and that turned in to a MAJOR production - you'd think I was asking him to build a damn skyscraper, for crying out loud!

I am an unemployed, stay-at-home mom who is used to having the house to myself for a large portion of the day.  I am used to doing even the most mundane of tasks without having to give someone all of the details of it.  For two months I have (mostly) been a good sport.  Not so much right now.  I want to run away from home and find a deserted house that I can just sit in and enjoy the quiet.  

Anyone have one of those that I can escape to for a couple of days?

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Is this really necessary?

So I'm watching the news this morning and there is a report that there is going to be another big expedition down to explore the remains of the Titanic.


And we need this, why??

Okay, I could see if we had this epidemic of sinking cruise ships, but we don't.  Actually, from as far as I can tell, this particular problem has never happened again.  Cruise ships are pretty darn safe and all of the makers have been smart enough to not JINX themselves by proclaiming their ships to be "unsinkable".  

I guess I wonder what they think it is that the world NEEDS to know.  Hey, smart-guy heading up the expedition:  We do not NEED this type of information.  Couldn't this money be better spent on something that actually HELPS the world today?  The ship hit an iceburg, it broke in half, too many lives were lost.  You going down there to make money for yourself on this horrific tragedy really is only serving yourself.  

Is looking at the wreckage bringing back lives?  No.  Is scanning the remains curing cancer?  No.  Will you, yourself, make a ton of money on documentaries, books and interviews?  Yes. 

Shame, shame, shame.

I'm not going to lie, the story of the Titanic is fascinating in it's tragedy.  It was amazing the first time we saw pictures of the actual wreckage but it was decided that the remains would not be brought to the surface because it was wrong (morally, ethically, whatever) but it seems to be okay to keep spending millions of dollars to go down there and look at it!  Wouldn't it have been better, in the long run, to just raise the ruins and examine it?  But I guess then these scientist guys couldn't keep spending money to go on deep-sea expeditions.


Monday, July 26, 2010

Okay, it's official...I am FREAKING out!

You know, you'd think that after 20 years of marriage to the same man who has worked in the same field would leave little room for surprises.  Well, you'd be wrong.  It is official...I am freaking out.  Big time.  Ready to lose my mind.

Two months.  Two-freaking-months of no work.  We have less than $200 in the bank, the rent is going to be due in a week, there are bills to pay (like our car payment) and food to buy.  I've got to tell you, friends, that $200 is not going to cut it!  

Yesterday at church the message was partially on how we have to wait on God's timing and while, yes, I agree with that, I'm beginning to feel like He's forgotten that we're here.  I'm a little angry and resentful towards my husband that he has put us in this position.  We are not to take matters in to our own hands and freak out, the message claimed, and yet here I am thinking "Well, if I (and I emphasize that "I") don't do something, my family is going to be living on the street!  So how is it exactly that I am supposed to be waiting patiently?  How am I supposed to know when it is ME taking matters in to my own hands to help my family and not GOD telling me to?  

I know that God has never left us without food on our table and a roof over our heads but I've got to be honest, this is the most scared I have been in 20 years!  I'm having to start cutting things from our lives that I really don't want to cut.  I'm having to tell the kids that they can't have things that they need and when I try to talk to Frank, he doesn't want to hear it! 

I'm alone in a house full of people.  I am alone in a world where others are dealing with the same thing.  I'm tired of being a charity case and yet right now I could use some charity!

Lord, where are you?  I am weak and scared and I don't know where you are?  I don't know what to do...

Saturday, July 24, 2010

There are just certain things that a parent doesn't need to see...

Tonight after dinner we got to watch the video of the graduation ceremony.  We paid $25 for it and I had no idea what to expect but they came in today and it was beautiful.  The videographer did a wonderful job and it was nice because we could just see Nick's parts and not have to go through all 19 graduates.

Note to self...I do NOT look good on video from the angle that this guy shot from.  I'm a little disappointed at that one.

Okay, so AFTER dinner Nick decides to show me some of the video that he and his friend Matt took while at Cornerstone.  He's mentioned that there was video but I didn't really give it much though.  So he put it up on the computer and it's a LOT of him dancing and moshing in the "pit" and I have to be honest...I wish I'd never seen it.  I mean, I grew up in the 80's where "dancing" meant you danced.  What they were doing was like nothing I ever saw, wanted to see or wish to see again!  It's just jumping around, flailing limbs and it's like having a standing seizure at times!  NO ONE NEEDS TO SEE THAT!

I mean, that would be like me pulling up a video of myself lifting my shirt and showing off my boobs at a Motley Crue concert!  No one needs to see that, either!

Friday, July 23, 2010

The waiting is the hardest part

On Tuesday, Frank went and had an interview of sorts.  It was to meet a guy who has a commercial building that needs a lot of work done.  There would be stripping and refinishing of concrete floors (which he has never done before) and painting of almost 17,000 square feet.  The job is huge.  

So he came home from the meeting and we had to really think about this because A.) He's never done commercial work and B.) well, there really was no "B" because we just need him to WORK!  He crunched the numbers for almost two full days, talked to a couple of different guys who work in the field to make sure his numbers were on target and late Thursday night, we e-mailed the proposal off.

And now we wait....

Thursday, July 22, 2010

The downside of "Free"

With the joy of having a self-employed spouse, comes severe budget restrictions.  I can be a whiz at using coupons and finding deals at any time, but when things are going well, I tend to forget how to do that!  One of the things that we have NEVER had is health insurance.  

When we first moved to NC I found out that our county's human services offered a program where I could get my annual for free.  Needless to say I have taken advantage of that every year since I found out about it!  When I got pregnant with Michael, we paid nothing and really, we were always able to get coverage for both the boys so except for the handful of times that I was tardy handing in our applications for them, we have had them covered.  Frank and I were the only ones that could not get covered - well, like I said, my pregnancy was covered but me in general, not so much.

Well last year while at my annual, because I am now over the age of 40, I was told that I needed to go for a mammogram.  Sure, good luck with that, I told the nurse.  She told me about a FREE program through one of the hospitals here in NC and they do a mobile mammography unit that does indeed do it for free.  Well, every time I had an appointment, the bus broke down so eventually they took pity on my and just sent me to the hospital to have it done.  It was NOT a pleasant experience but it's one that every woman should do so I sucked it up and did it.  

Several weeks ago I get a letter from said hospital reminding me that it's time for another mammogram.  Oh, joy!  The only problem with that was that NOW you are no longer required to go ANNUALLY for an exam/PAP and so I had only gotten the freebie mammogram through that appointment.  What's a girl to do?  Skip the darn thing was my first thought!  As luck would have it, a local church was going to have the mobile unit come out and needed 24 women.  So I got on the schedule and went.  Not as UN-pleasant as the last time, but still not a way that I want to spend any part of my day.  

So I get off of the bus and see that the church is have a HUGE health expo.  So I go inside and check it out.  I get my glucose checked (it was fine), I talk to a nutritionist (yeah, for Weight Watchers), I collect a lot of brochures on multiple topics and while I am waiting to speak to a cardiologist (I had open heart surgery when I was 4 and hadn't been to a cardiologist in about 15 years) I walked over to this table to get my lung capacity checked.

(Insert impending doom-ish music here)

If you've never tested your lung capacity, it's not a bad test.  You blow in to a tube for like 10 seconds (which is longer than you would think) and it gives you a reading.  The nurse tested me THREE times and it turns out that I have LOW LUNG CAPACITY!  What the WHAT??  I mean, who gets that???  And you know what?  She had NO information for me as to what I should DO with this information!

But wait, that's not all...then I go in to the cardiologist (which I thought was kind of cool that they even had one there) and we talk and I have been having some mild symptoms with palpitations and shortness of breath and so he suggests doing an Echo-cardiogram  and a cardiogram.  Okay, fine.  So the tech comes in and gets me hooked up for the Echo and we're chatting and what not and she's pointing things out to me on my heart when the machine is doing it's thing and then she changes view points and shows me the four chambers of my heart and then she STOPS TALKING and starts doing all sorts of things on the machine.  I'm like "OH NO...I'm gonna get bad news and die".  Dramatic, right?  Long story short, I have a normal abnormality in one of my chambers that sometimes makes it look like I have FIVE chambers and it's not life threatening, it won't cause a heart attack but it is a contributor to my palpitations and all that.

So to recap on my FREE medical adventure:  I got my boobies smashed, I have poor lung capacity and a normal abnormality of my heart.  I should have stayed at home, in bed with the blankets pulled over my head!!

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Sorry for the delay...

Okay, so I have been M.I.A. for a little while.  Sorry.  Life is killing me right now and there's not much to write about that doesn't come off just sounding like a bitch-fest, so I decided to spare you all.

But I think I'm coming out of it.  Things aren't as bleak as they seem.  Frank went on an interview today that looks promising for taking his business in a whole new direction.  We won't know for sure until the end of the week but I am thinking positive about it.  

School is going well for Michael and that makes me smile.  Nick got an internship with a great company and so he is psyched about that.  I am gearing up for perhaps teaching some writing classes in the Fall and I am going to a curriculum and resource fair for homeschooler's this weekend to try and promote them.  

We had some friends over for dinner Monday night and it was wonderful.  I love having people over who just make you smile and laugh the whole time.  I am blessed.  

AND...I lost 2 1/2 pounds last week so....Stace is back!

Friday, July 16, 2010

Be Careful of What Your Facebook Status Is...

...because it may cause others to have to write nasty things back to you!

No, this has not happened to me, personally, but I am on the VERGE of making a comment after someone's status that would really serve no purpose except to let me get 30 years of anger off of my chest!  So that should be a good reason, right?

So here's the thing, I am friends with a cousin of mine on Facebook.  She is younger than me, she had some issues while growing up and for a while, our families lived together.  During that time, she stole from me.  Not anything big, but she stole from me.  Years later as adults, I came to find out that she had started stealing from me again when she would come over to babysit Nick and then later still, just when she would come over with the family to visit.  At first, I did not know how to go about confronting her but without giving out too much detail, I finally FOUND most of my stuff in her room.  And she had the NERVE to deny doing it!!  She looked at me as if I had lost my freakin mind and was making it up.  Okay, sure, because NORMAL people take boatloads of their own stuff and PLANT IT in someone else's house for funsy sake!

After that, we no longer lived near one another and so I felt someone safe and that my belongings would stay where they belong - with me.  Relatives got mad at ME - refused to speak to ME - because I had accused her of this stuff and even though I had proof, I was the bad guy.  Well fast forward a year and now she's stealing from those relatives AND her place of business.  She gets mall-cop arrested and my uncle went in to help her and defend her but no one bothered to tell him her history of stealing!  Needless to say, he was not amused.  And all through this, she has not ONCE apologized or admitted to her crimes.  

So now here we are in present day and for like the last month, anytime she posts a status about herself it is about being betrayed!  How dare someone BETRAY her and then not have the decency to own up to it!  REALLY???  This girl STOLE THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS from our Grandmother and left her in debt and then took off and she wants to bitch about being betrayed??

I'm sorry, but I can only hope that whoever it is KEEPS betraying her until she learns something from it.  It's too late to apologize to our grandmother but she has other people to apologize to...and I can only hope that I hold it together enough to NOT remind her of her misdeeds in the "comment" section of her next status!

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Back on the band wagon...

Okay, so after all of my rantings I have put the fork DOWN and am refocusing on my Weight Watchers again in hopes of dropping another 20 pounds by Thanksgiving.  Can I just say that being fat SUCKS!

The thing that I don't like about this phase right now is that I find myself obsessing about food.  A lot.  Every thing that I want to eat I have to sit and analyze first and decide "is it worth it?"  Tomorrow night I will be hosting the ladies from my small group here for bible study.  I have to make the snacks.  Now, I CAN make healthy, nutritious snacks, but where's the fun in that?  No, seriously I am making some low-fat brownie bites and some gluten-free chips with salsa and queso dip.  The queso is not-so-much on the Weight Watchers plan but it is OH-SO good!

I am exercising again.  Friday I went to the Y and did 20 minutes on the treadmill, 25 minutes on the bike and 10 minutes on the elliptical torture machine plus I did some of the random weight machines and worked my arms.  My whole body hurt.  Saturday I walked 2 miles, Sunday I walked 5 miles, Monday I walked 3 miles and Tuesday (today) I walked 2 miles plus did some weights.  I have to keep up this momentum because I don't like how I feel!  It's killing me!  

Oh, and here's something to add to my husband!  I called him yesterday (I think I mentioned that in an earlier post) and while we were talking he asked about how I did at my weigh-in.  I told him that I did NOT want to talk about it and he haggled a bit and whatnot but eventually let it go.  Well, this morning, about TWO minutes after opening his eyes he's like "So really, you're not gonna tell me how much you gained?"  I wanted to kill him.  So we argued, I yelled and then I told him how much I had gained and was like "Happy now??"  I really felt like he had no consideration for my feelings with this.  I mean, he doesn't tell me everything and this was something that I specifically told him that I did not want to talk about but because he wanted to know, he wasn't going to let it up until HE felt better.  Not a good way to start the day.  That argument dragged on for HOURS.  And why did it drag on for hours?  BECAUSE HE HAD NO WORK AND WAS HOME ALL FREAKIN DAY!!!

I think if I ate an entire box of Hostess cupcakes, that I should be excused for that for having to deal with this!

Monday, July 12, 2010

The voices that won't let me sleep!

So it was a pretty eventful Monday and I'm not really liking it!  First, things went great at court for Nick - they dismissed the case and he didn't have to pay a dime.  PRAISE THE LORD!!

I gained two pounds.  Sure, I had it coming.  There was the McDonald's Angus Deluxe with fries, a 4-piece chicken nuggets, a coke AND the hot fudge sundae that I had for dinner last Wednesday night with Michael AFTER I had a spicy chicken sandwich with cole slaw and a side salad (also with a coke) from Chic-Fil-A for lunch with Nick!  For those of you who are wondering?  That was NOT on the Weight Watchers plan!

Day two of school went well.  The boy did his homework without major complaining so that, in my book, is a victory.  The bus situation?  I'm still not impressed.  I don't think I mentioned this but because of stupid budgeting, there aren't enough busses this year and so the elementary school (where Michael goes) and the middle school (which is on the same property) now have to SHARE their busses.  What this means basically is that the elementary school lets out at 2:40...they release the car pool kids and the YMCA kids and then the bus kids get released at 2:50.  They load their busses and then drive over to the middle school which doesn't release until 3:05.  Now you're waiting for THOSE kids to board the bus before departing school property - approximately 30 minutes after the initial release.  Both Friday and today, Michael has gotten home at 3:40 - an HOUR after his initial release.  I am extending grace in that I am giving the bus driver a week to see if she adjusts to the route, extra kids, etc. but if by Friday he is not getting home any earlier then I have to seriously consider going back to car pooling - which I hate.  

Well, hate is really a strong word.  I have no one to actually "car pool" with - they have all buddied up already and so...the cheese stands alone, so to speak.  So I'll be sacrificing my time to save my boy some time in his day.  That's what mom's are supposed to do, right?

I need to find an agent.  Seriously.  I am writing and writing and writing and would really love to sit down with someone and get some guidance on how to find an agent and to tweak my pitch/query but we are BROKE right now.  Totally and completely broke.  So not going to happen right now.

And speaking of broke...I was going to go away for the weekend with a friend down to Myrtle Beach.  Actually, about 30 miles south of Myrtle Beach but due to finances and other life annoyances, I had to back out of that and I'm NOT happy about it!  

I worked out at the Y on Friday and my butt is STILL sore!

I'm thinking about going back to school.  Clearly no one wants to hire me "as is" and so I'm seriously contemplating that whole "Obama wants moms to go back to school" angle and see what I can do.  I'm meeting with a friend on Wednesday to try and make heads or tails out of the whole shebang.

I am going to be published THREE times on the Magic for Less guest blog.  My first article is up and running and the other two will run at the end of the month.  I won two 5x7 Photopass pictures for our next trip - it's a sweet $25 deal - so yeah, me!

Now to turn on the fan, get under the blankets and pray for sleep...

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Keep those pictures in a drawer, for crying out loud!

So has this ever happened to you?  You go to an event, you take pictures, you get them developed and then put them in a photo album?  Sounds normal, right?  What could you possibly have to argue about with such a situation?  Well, I'll tell you...

I have been in scrapbooking mode for the last two weeks.  While Nick was away, it was a way for me to have something to do so that I wasn't obsessing about where he was and what he was doing.  So I had scrapbooked the pictures from a wedding we went to back in October where Nick was a groomsman (it was his girlfriend's sister's wedding) and then I did the pictures from the photo shoot that Nick and Beckah had when they were up in the mountains helping her aunt out (who is the nutritionist and for her wellness retreat) and then, finally, our pictures from Thanksgiving when we went back to the same aunt's house in the mountains.  The second album was from graduation.  All 240 pictures from graduation.

Still sounds normal, right?

This has turned in to a great source of angst in my home.  Why?  Because Frank feels that I am already treating Nick and Beckah as if they are married because I have these photo albums that are primarily THEM.  He's like "What if they break up?"  So what does that mean - that I should NEVER take pictures because they might or might not be together ten years from now?  What's up with that?  If that's your mind set then I guess I should never take pictures of anyone but the four of us because the rest of the world is just too unpredictable!  Seriously!  I guess you shouldn't take pictures at weddings because, hey, they might get divorced.  Don't take pictures at birthday parties because you may not be friends with these people somewhere down the road! 
Frank has argued that I'm taking it the wrong way and that he's not saying that but he has no other way to describe what he's trying to say.  My point was that these pictures document NICK'S life!  He was IN the wedding party, he HAD a professional photo shoot done, HE graduated!  I mean, somewhere in the conversation it seemed that it didn't bother him that I TOOK the pictures, just that I was putting them in nice scrapbooks.  Maybe I should just take the pictures, develop them, and then cram them in a drawer and never look at them again!  Honestly, the man makes me crazy!

Why are men so weird???

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Yet another life lesson to be learned...dang it!

A little over a month ago, Nick got a ticket.  No, he wasn't speeding or anything like that, his registration was expired.  He's got the ticket, he's got the court date which is finally here.

On Monday, the boy has to go in to the big city (insert sarcastic tone here) of Raleigh and go to the county courthouse to take care of this matter.  He is literally freaking out.  Big time.  You know, when you get a ticket, people come out of the woodwork to share their court horror stories or victory stories and you know what?  There is NO consistency!  We have no idea what to expect on Monday because it is different for everyone.

It used to be if you got a ticket for something like an expired registration or inspection sticker and you had it taken care of by your court date, then the case was dismissed and no fine to be paid.  We're hoping for THAT scenario.  But at other times, there have been fees to pay that seem to vary.  So now not only is my boy freaking out, but now he's confused too!

Frank can't go with him to court because it's at 11:00 and he'll be at work (God willing) and I can't go because...well, I technically CAN go but really, I don't want to go.  I hate the court house.  The Wake County court system has done some pretty horrible things to us such as mis-typing a code on a ticket that Frank got that ended up having his license suspended and when we fought it and had to get a lawyer involved the court was like "OOPS, the clerk typed in the wrong code.  Sorry."  Now, Frank lost a LOT of work due to his inability to DRIVE anywhere and we had to pay $1200 for a lawyer!  In my mind, the state owed us more than an apology.  Then there was the time that Frank got a ticket because he was target shooting on the gamelands and even though it does not state ANYWHERE that you cannot do it, he got the ticket - and then FORGOT about the ticket.  Cops came to the house, took him away in cuffs, I had to bail him out, blah, blah, blah and when he finally went to court, NO ONE - not even the JUDGE knew why he got the ticket!  But they made him pay the $90 court cost!!  Bottom line, I am NOT a fan of the court system.

So Lea, Alison...friends that have North Carolina policemen in their family, if you have any advice, I would love to hear it so I can put his mind at ease and feel better about NOT going with him!

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

I'm more excited than he is!

Here in North Carolina there are a lot of year-round schools and Michael goes to one of them.  We have enjoyed the year-round experience for the most part and today was our big "Back to School/Meet the Teacher" extravaganza!

I normally dread these things because it's like you go, you meet, you barely get to talk because there is always ONE parent who thinks that the whole purpose of this is to talk about HER child and I am normally standing in line behind her.  Not a pleasant experience.  So we went and can I just say that I LOVE this teacher!  Honestly, I spoke to her (alone and with other moms) for maybe a total of ten minutes but I am seriously giddy at the thought of her being Michael's teacher.

A.)  She is a history major and Michael is a HUGE history buff - reading about World War II in his spare time and watching the History Channel for fun.

B.)  She is an older woman who seems very wise and friendly and very competent in how to handle all of the little quirks that come with a classroom full of 10-year olds.

And finally...C.)  She is a Disney fanatic.


This Moment in Hardcore - Part 2

So my boy is home from Cornerstone and it has been a whirlwind of discussion of all that went on, who they met, blah, blah, blah and suddenly it is like they are being "courted" by different magazines and websites who want to know more about them and get them to advertise with these different genres and my boy is just giddy beside himself!

So while the wheels are in motion, we decided to start up a blog to help promote who "This Moment in Hardcore" (TMiH) is and so you can check out the new blog HERE.

There isn't much content there yet but keep watching because I am thinking that something BIG is going to come of this by the end of the summer!  

Stay tuned...

Monday, July 5, 2010

It's like a moving epidemic!

You know, when you have a child that is graduating you get a lot of "So when is he moving out?" from people you know and at some point you will hear "I can't WAIT to move out" from your child.  We've heard that from Nick but we're pretty secure in the knowledge that he's not going anywhere anytime soon because well, he can't.  Financially he is pretty much stuck living with us, like it or not.

After having him be away for ten days I am almost giddy at the thought of seeing him tonight.  I missed him terribly but I knew that - God willing - he would be back.  When I was lamenting on much I couldn't wait to see him, my girl Danette joked that she was going to record me saying that because a week from now I'm going to want to kill him over something stupid that he does!  Sad but true.

Tonight I was on Facebook and a friend commented on my big "NICK IS COMING HOME" status that her son left for Iowa today to live.  He moved out, felt like he could not really do anything here job-wise and left.   He is the same age as Nick.  As a matter of fact, they have been friends since they were four years old!  His mom was sick with worry about his traveling which I COMPLETELY understood and really, it's a weird time of life because I know, for me anyway, that there are times that you WISH they'd move out; they make you crazy, they're messy and inconsiderate, they smell and argue about everything but then there are times like what I am feeling right now where I am practically standing with my face pressed up against the window because Frank just called to say that he is almost home with our son.

One of the families that we graduated with a month ago and who we have been friends with for a couple of years had their graduate essentially leave home the day after graduation with no real warning.  I believe she left a note.  She didn't like their rules and having to live with them and so she moved in with a neighbor or some such thing!  The parents are devastated and beside themselves and yet, at the same time, feeling a little bit of relief that there will be a little less stress and strife in their lives.

I know that moving out is something that we all do and it is part of life but I long for the days or maybe the reports from someone that it wasn't done in haste or in anger...that it was just as it was supposed to be...because it's time.

Sunday, July 4, 2010

The Cornerstone Chronicles: Day Seven - Final Chapter

So the big Cornerstone Festival is now part of our history.  Nick and Matt left the grounds early this morning around 7 a.m and were on their way to St. Louis for a bit of sight-seeing and then it is on to Nashville for the night.

He called me this morning around 10 and I am ashamed to admit that I had slept through church due to my husband's ROCK STAR performance yesterday at the block party!  But I managed to stumble from the bed to answer the phone and talk to my boy who is SO excited to actually sleep in a bed last night and asked if I would be willing to pick him up from Matt's house tomorrow night when they get in rather than sleeping at Matt's as originally planned.  At this point, I'd almost be willing to meet him in Tennessee just to see him and hug him!

I was not aware that he had taken a camera with him (I knew he had a video camera with him but had no idea about the regular camera) and so I am excited to see some pictures when he gets back.  I'm hoping they take some in St. Louis as well as Nashville since I've never been to either one of them.

I was blessed this week with the gift of time - time to get some things done that otherwise I might not have.  It had nothing to do with Cornerstone but I'm just feeling a sense of accomplishment right now with the fact that I got TWO scrapbooks done this week and they both look good.  I spent time with friends and am in the process of making plans for the upcoming weeks with other friends.  Life is good.  Michael goes back to school on FRIDAY (what is up with THAT??) and so life will start returning to normal.

Whatever that is...

Saturday, July 3, 2010

The Cornerstone Chronicles: Day Six

Okay, so today is officially the LAST DAY of Cornerstone and my boy is so ready to come home!  That is a good thing.  I think I would have been devastated had he had such a good time that coming home was a bad thing.  

He called this morning, early again, and exhausted still.  They will sleep in the tent for one more night and then leave tomorrow morning on their way to St. Louis where they'll spend a couple of hours and then on to Nashville where they will spend the night.  I have to admit, I'm kind of jealous of that part. I'm not a fan of country music or anything, but I've always wanted to go to Nashville...and Memphis and visit Graceland.  Again, not a fan of Elvis, but I sort of have a weird "thing" about dead celebrities and where they lived.  TMI, perhaps.

All in all he seemed to have a great week and learned some valuable lessons for next time - like take an air mattress or padding of some sort and bring more clothes because you never know when the weather is going to turn cold!  Good times.

As for me, today is the block party where Frank's band is going to play for the first time.  Luckily, I do not have to be there until around 6.  It's pretty nice outside today - not as oppressive as weeks gone by so I may just survive this. 

I'll let you know...

Friday, July 2, 2010

The Cornerstone Chronicles: Day Five

While basking in the afterglow of a child-free night, I woke up this morning after Frank had long-since left for work and got a phone call from Nick.  Again, a very tired Nick.

I didn't think it was possible for him to sound any more tired than he did yesterday, but he did.  He even mentioned how they thought about leaving today and coming home early. of their favorite bands will be playing tomorrow and so they are going to stick it out and see it all through to the end.  The crazy thing is that most of these bands are going to be here in Raleigh next week for "Scream the Prayer" - which is an all-day Christian concert that Nick went to a year ago.  How ironic is that?  He was like "Why did we do this when we could have just seen all these bands at home?"  I kind of felt bad for him.

Believe it or not, I encouraged him to stay and told him he'd be sorry if he left before it was done.  How do I know this?  Because for MY senior trip (way back when) my mom and I flew to California (we lived in New York at the time) and had a 10-day trip planned.  We started in San Francisco and then drove the coast to L.A. stopping along the way in some of the most beautiful places.  And you know what?  We LEFT EARLY because we were both in fairly new relationships with our boyfriends and didn't want to be away from them any longer!  HOW STUPID WERE WE???  I mean, my mother went on to marry her loser and spent 20 years in hell with him whereas the dumbass that I was dating turned out to be my biggest mistake.  You know the type, the kind of guy that makes every other guy on the planet look good because he's so awful?  Yeah, THAT guy.  So had I stayed in California those two extra days, he could have cheated sooner and we could have broken up sooner.

Hindsight and all that...

Thursday, July 1, 2010

The Cornerstone Chronicles: Day Four

My boy sounds very, very tired.  He is still having fun but he is exhausted.  Talk about rock til you drop!  He called this afternoon while I was out and I had left explicit instructions with Frank (who was home with no work today) that our son's cell phone had died and so when he called, the caller ID would say his friend Matt's name and to make sure that he answered it.  I even told him around the time to expect the call.

You see where this is going, right?

I was out all morning with friends and got home around 2:30 and there are SEVERAL messages on the machine so I'm like "Who called?" and Frank's like "I don't know".  


So I go through the numbers on the phone - because listening to the messages would be the NORMAL thing to do - and sure enough, Nick had called.  I'm like "YOU MISSED NICK'S CALL??"  (ready to strangle the man!) and he's like "I guess".  Now I'm seriously contemplating the homicide and decide to pull it together and just call Nick back on the friend's phone.  No answer.  We leave him a message to call us back on our cell phones because we were going to be out running errands and whatnot.  

Clearly he did not get the message because he called us again, a few minutes later mind you, on the home phone.  My heart broke when I heard his tired little voice.  I just want to run over there with a real meal and a cushion for his sleeping bag and just a whole heaping load of "there-there".  But I can't.  After talking for a few minutes and getting all of the updates, I finally did listen to the messages and he sounded pitiful on there, too.

But you know what?  As tired and pitiful as he sounds, he is still having fun and he will be talking about this for YEARS to come.  But still, I am counting down till Tuesday.  You know what got me through tonight?  Michael got invited to a spur-of-the-moment sleepover and so Frank and I got a night out and were able to come home to a house that we had to ourselves.

Excuse me while I go swing from the chandelier!!

Oh, and Jenn?  A windmill kick is when you swing your leg in a high kick in front of you and purposefully kick someone in the face!  Crazy, right?