It was one of those 'hey, baby' calls that I just should have ignored. Yesterday, my dad called. He had called earlier in the day according to Nick but never left a message. When he called again late yesterday afternoon, I figured he really must have something to say. The family was double-whammied yesterday. Both of my dad's brothers are in the hospital - one in Vegas, one in Florida. Odd how the pill-popping, boozer is now the healthy one!
Anyway, the uncle in Vegas has just discovered that he has lung cancer. He was in Vegas to visit his son and his family and was disoriented when he got off of the plane and could not breathe. At the hospital, the doctors originally thought that he had pneumonia. After several more tests, they found cancer. The uncle in Florida is recovering from several blocks in his arteries - this is fairly common, not just in our family, but I think common in general. People have this done all of the time.
After dumping all of this news on me, dad demands (yes, demands) that I call my uncles. Now, it is not that I am opposed to calling either of them. Certainly not. But first of all, the Vegas uncle, can't speak! He is so uncomfortable that he honestly cannot speak on the phone! Why would you encourage someone to call and cause pain? Why not wait until he is home or at least at his son's and feeling better? The other uncle I have not spoken to in over 10 years. I have a problem with people coming out of the woodwork when someone gets sick. I think it is hypocritical. It's sort of like seeing someone at a funeral who has had no part of the deceased life for years. I understand the aspect of respect, but ...I don't know. Again, it's like bringing flowers to the grave of someone you ignored in life.
I will eventually make these calls. I think. I just think that for a man that doesn't bother with either of his brothers, who passed on this trait to his daughters, has no right to make demands on us to call anyone. It sounds kind of cold, I know. But know this, friends, I will seriously look at my caller ID next time and think for a moment before answering.
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