Wedding Bell Blues

It is somewhat official. My sister is going to marry that lying, two-faced...(fill in your own word here, mine's too vile). It amazes me that they can even be planning a wedding when neither of them is even divorced. Call me old-fashioned but the whole thing just makes me want to scream. I got the news via my rather irate mother. She seems to think that the whole thing is ridiculous, too, but none of us can stop the train from jumping the tracks.

Here's the dilema...sister wedding #1 had us all in attendance. My parents were divorced and although my dad did everything humanly possible to diminish my mother's role in the wedding, on the actual day everyone was cordial. The four of us even rode in the limo together to the church. That was the first time it had happend that we were alone - our little family - in several years. Sister wedding #2 had none of us in attendance (except for the bride). Sis and dad weren't speaking, mom and dad weren't speaking, mom wasn't really allowed to speak to either of her daughters and I was too poor to go on a seven day cruise for the wedding. So now we're looking at sister wedding #3. Everyone's speaking! It's a regular love-fest! Everyone gets along and seems to enjoy one another's company. Ick. But I do not wish to go to this wedding as I have stated numerous times in the past. I mean, no one really knows when this is all going to take place but I'm telling you, chances are good that mom and dad will both go and if I don't, it's going to be blazingly obvious. In the past when my sister had a major event planned (after wedding #2), whenever I tried to back out of it - mainly for financial reasons - she would always offer to pay for me because she wanted me there. I don't get it. So if I say my usual "No, sorry, I can't afford it" and she says her usual "It's okay, I'll help" then what? I guess I can demand that I won't go without Frank and the kids. Maybe that would be pushing my luck and she'll be unwilling to go for it. But oh! did I mention how this magical event may take place on a private island in Jamaica where there's a house that sleeps 22 people and comes fully staffed?

Just another reason for me to hate the beach.