Wednesday, September 2, 2009

The Hair's in my Head Just Decreased Greatly...

You know, with unemployment, theft and all of the other joys of life lately, there hasn't been as much teen drama to focus on. Well, wait no longer friends, it's BACK (and with a vengeance!).

Let me start with "I love my children". I shall chant that repeatedly for the next couple of hours. The other day, Nick asked if he could go to the mountains for a week with his girlfriend. Um, no. Seriously, that was my first thought. They aren't going alone, they are staying with family but There was the usual yelling, screaming, weeping and gnashing of teeth - full-fledged drama. After attempts on both of our parts (mine and Nick's) to have a rational discussion I said that we would have to wait and talk to his father. This was met with more whining, weeping, etc. "Why do we have to involve HIM?" Um, probably because he's your DAD and he has the right to be in on such a discussion. Okay, fine.

This morning as I'm driving the boy to work - you know, the one who STILL doesn't have his license? - and he informs me that he spoke to Frank last night while I was sleeping and it was agreed upon that as long as this was all okay with the girlfriends' parents, then we were okay. And the only way we would know this is to have her parents call us and tell us that it was okay - we weren't taking his word for it. Okay, fine.

After work today, Nick gives me the specifics on this trip. It's not a week, it's closer to a week and a half. I'm not fine with this because he has bills to pay, he doesn't get a lot of hours at work and so missing all of this time will most definitely cause a problem.

Insert teenager telling me I'm wrong HERE.

This WON'T effect his income, everything will be absolutely perfect, it's not a week and a half, it's a week and two days (you can see where I would be starting to lose my mind here, right?) My voice escalates, his main comments are "You're wrong" and I find myself hitting new levels of frustration that have me reaching for my head and yanking on my own hair rather than reaching for him and strangling him. You know, I have twenty years experience in retail management. I know that when someone goes on vacation and takes time off, someone else has to fill that place. Should that replacement do a better job, then who do you think will get the preferred hours when the first employee returns? I just don't feel that with the history this store has had with cutting his hours I am just not comfortable with him taking this risk. He tells me that he is responsible and does what he is supposed to do. Okay, let's take a moment here...yes, he does have a job, yes he pays his car insurance. BUT...we have not had his contribution to the cell phone bill in months, he doesn't have a license so he doesn't pay for gas, he spends his money on ridiculous things...I know, perhaps I'm grasping at straws here but, I don't believe that he fully grasps the whole "responsibility" thing. It is not a "sometimes" thing...If you are going to claim that you are a responsible party with such conviction, then you need to BE RESPONSIBLE!!!

After I used the tone only heard by the neighborhood dogs, the boy stormed out and...called Frank. Sure, NOW he wants his dad involved! Frank then called me, talked me down from the ledge as I swept up my now-removed hair, and within the hour the boy apologized for not acting like an adult. Do I feel a little manipulated? Sure. Do I think that he was totally sincere in his apology? I'm not sure.

The jury's still out and I have a headache...


Unknown said...

is he not in school? could he maybe switch with someone else to pick up his time? just trying to think of some ideas.

hope your day gets better...xoxox

carol at A Second Cup said...

Lets switch kids. Mine is delightful for you and yours is for me. This makes perfect sense to me.

When did girl friend instead of best friends or just friends restart?

Joy said...

Oh dear, I don't know what to say. I still consider myself young mom and I have three boys ages 9,6 and 4. They don't have that kind of demands yet but gosh, I started to think what to do if that situation happen to me.