Monday, September 26, 2011

I Should Have Lunch With Yoko...

So Frank's band had a gig on Saturday.  It was supposed to be an outdoor thing but we've been having a lot of rain so it was moved to an inside venue. A Tavern.  So what was supposed to be a family thing for all of us and in the end, we all decided it was not a kid-friendly place in the tavern.  

But I digress...

I have band issues.  I openly admit it.  I went with Frank to load up the equipment.  Three of the four band mates were there.  We drove to the Tavern.  Three of the four unloaded the equipment.  I had to sit in the van for 30 minutes while they unloaded to make sure we didn't get ticketed or towed.   I was not amused.  

The performance was not the best.  Three of the four band mates had bad sound.  After they were done, I approached the stage area and mentioned the sound issue, and the guy with the good sound did not, shall we say, "Appreciate" my observation.  Three of the four packed up the equipment and loaded the van back up, three of the four went back to the storage place where they (and two wives - including me) unloaded the van and put everything away.  

I had a freaking fit.  I mean, this guy has pissed me off for a long time but now that they are performing out in public, this sort of behavior is just not acceptable.  I ranted and raved to Frank and he was told me that I am not allowed to be the one to say something to this guy because I am too biased.  Like I care if this slack-ass jerk thinks I am biased!  What I am concerned about it is my husband being treated like the hired help.  They are a BAND not a solo act!  Frank is a member of the BAND not a roadie!

As I listened to myself ranting and raving, I began to feel like I was TRYING to break up the band...and that's not the case.  I am just not a fan of letting someone take advantage of people who are supposed to be their friend.  I am not a fan of someone being manipulative of people that they are supposed to work with.

Now I fear that I've put the idea in his mind that he needs to quit the band.  That was totally not my intent.  I was really hoping that he'd let me go and scream at this such luck.


Karen said...

Oh no! You were just trying to help and it got all twisted. I hope your husband understands your point.

Grampy said...

I understand that your husband doesn't want any trouble. But he needs to look around and see what is happening.Just my opinion.LOL

Janiss said...

I've worked as a journalist and been around the Los Angeles music scene since the mid-1980s. My fiance, who I have been with since 1994, is a successful musician, with a platinum album under his belt from the hair metal days. I've interviewed hundreds of musicians, written a book with one and dated quite a few before the guy I'm currently with. And one thing I know is the wives and girlfriends are NOT EVER supposed to mess with the band! It's one of the reasons why some 80s bands had rules that the girlfriends and wives were not allowed backstage - because one girl ruined it for the rest of them! Of course, we all talk to our guys when we are away from the band - we tell him he's not being appreciated enough, that the band would be nothing without him, that he should be doing something better than the band he is currently in, etc. And that invariably winds up causing trouble too, LOL! But yeah, we're not supposed to do it to the other guys' faces. Seriously, it really is a rule! If Frank can't deal with it on his own, he has to suck it up, and your saying anything will only make things worse.

I know it does not sound fair, especially for a strong woman like you (or me), but that is how things work in the music biz.