Saturday, January 23, 2010

How to handle stress

I was searching through some files the other day and found this one. Thought it was good for a mindless laugh.

How to Handle Stress:
1. Jam tiny marshmallows up your nose and try to sneeze them out.
2. Use your Mastercard to pay your Visa bill.
3. Pop some popcorn without putting the lid on.
4. When someone says "Have a nice day!" tell them you have other plans.
During your next meeting, sneeze and then loudly suck the phlegm back down your throat.
6. Find out what a frog in a blender really looks like.
7. Make a list of things you've already done.
8. Dance naked in front of the pets.
9. Put your toddler's clothes on backwards and send him off to preschool as if nothing was wrong.
10. Thumb through National Geographic and draw underwear on the natives.
11. Go shopping. Buy everything. Sweat in them. Return them the next day.
12. Drive to work in reverse.
13. Read the dictionary backwards for subliminal messages.
14. Start a nasty rumor and see if you recognize it when it gets back to you.
15. Bill your doctor for the time you spent in his waiting room.
16. Get a box of condoms. Wait in line at the check-out counter and ask the cashier where the fitting rooms are.

Snarky, I know. But good for a laugh.

*Today's article is on part 4 of the 50 states field trip.  You can read it HERE.  Thanks!*


A.Marie said...

Oh Wow! I don't know whether to laugh or gag! #6 just about did me in!! :)

Unknown said...

These are awesome, thanks!

jenn said...

I love it! Although I think I can live the rest of my life without knowing what a frog looks like in a blender.

Frugal Vicki said...

okay, number 16 is too freaking funny. Although, as a girl they may be really confused if I were to ask this

Catherine said...

What a great post! This is so funny, brought a smile to my face! Have a great weekend! :)

Petula said...

You should have added as the last one: Read this list over and over. That was too funny. Thanks for a good chuckle.