Wednesday, January 13, 2010

The Give & Take of Marriage

Frank and I have been together for 20 years now. He is five years older than I am. We have completely different tastes in music, movies and television shows. We have found that fine balance in life where we each get to enjoy what we like without isolating the other.

Until tonight.

If I were honest, I'd say that Frank is WAY more giving than I am. Not in all things, mind you, but in a lot of things. The TV in the living room is his domain and we do not watch ANYTHING unless he wants to. Luckily there is a TV in our bedroom that I go to when I just cannot stand another documentary or classic movie on TMC. I don't make him watch Entertainment Tonight. I've learned to enjoy Jeopardy.

Riding in the car is the hardest. We've taken very long trips in virtual silence for long periods of time because we cannot agree on a radio station or a CD. I am an 80's rock kind of gal and he is a 70's rock kind of guy. BIG difference. To him, all of the big hair bands of the 80's are awful, untalented, heinous and annoying. In other words, they suck. While to me the 70's music that he listens to like Led Zepplin, Rush, Genesis (with Peter Gabriel) are just too damn annoying for words. I hate them all.

But being that he is a giving person, he has taken me to see quite a few concerts of 80's bands (Like the Def Leppard/Poison/Cheap Trick show this summer) while I have cheerfully bought tickets for him for shows and sent him off with a friend or two to enjoy.

Until tonight.

Tonight, my friends, I am going to have to sit and endure something that I never, ever, EVER wanted to experience. I am going to a show with Frank tonight as part of his birthday present (my present to him for HIS birthday) to, I don't even want to type it...Zappa Plays Zappa. Yes, for those of you who can remember the 70's, I'm talking about the music of Frank Zappa. And yes, if you are thinking "Hey, isn't Frank Zappa dead?" you would be correct. That's right...this isn't even the actual artist coming and performing, it is his SON, Dweezil, who is putting on this show.

There are NO WORDS at this point to describe my dread. And to add to the joy of it all, I have cramps and a sinus infection. I should be a barrel of laughs tonight shouldn't I?

My poor husband. My poor, poor, husband.


Mommy Kennedy said...

Happy Belated Birthday!

I completely understand what you are saying! There are times that my husband just rambles about stuff that is of no interest to me. But I try to remember that he has been my BFF for 20 years too!

I'm sure I ramble about stuff that is of no interest to him either!

jenn said...

He bought you tickets to a concert you wouldn't enjoy for your birthday? I would be thinking of a little payback when his birthday comes!

Unknown said...

you're a trooper, that's for sure...hehehe.

have a great day...hugz!

David said...

I'm a 70's kind of guy when it come to music but I can even stand Frank Zappa music. You're a good wife!! Your husband needs help in the music section.

Lola said...

You have my sympathy. Is there anyway you can slip some earbuds in your ears and an ipod in your pocket and groove to your own tunes?

Metallman said...

Hey there Stacey,

Oh man... Frank Zappa! I feel for you, woman. I do. I'm an 80's type person too (even though I'm 27, lol) and I completely agree that there is a huge difference between the 80s and 90s. Man... Hop you make it out ok. Later!

Jessie said...

OOOH, that's gonna be a rough time for you. And sinus issues and cramps as well? UGH!

I guess I'll have to count myself lucky then. My husband and I both love classic rock, a lot of new music, AND goofing around, so we also enjoy the bad 80s music together.

I can see how that wouldn't happen for everyone though. My sympathies.

We also get along on a lot of TV, though I'm more inclined to watch the same Myth Buster's with him for the hundredth time than to force him watch some chick programming - I do that when he works late. I know when I'm watching something bad (even if I like it anyway) and making him watch it with me would just be painful.

Anonymous said...

I go back to the 60's Frank Zappa and the Mothers of Invention,

Janiss said...

Oh, I can SO relate in my own weird musical way! My fiance was actually IN one of those '80s bands (Kix... still is, in fact), but he is totally a '70s guy, into stuff like the Allman Brothers, the Stones and, in the past few years, alt country. None of this interests me in the least (well, Sticky Fingers era Stones was kind of cool). I'm from the punk/ indie/ hard rock side of the '80s, into everything from the Cult to the Dead Kennedys to classic (i.e., '80s only) Metallica. And I am possibly one of the biggest Cheap Trick fans ever (at least he likes them. And Devo - on those we can agree). Brian took me to a Lucinda Williams concert once (he LOVES her) and by her third encore, I ran out of the House of Blues, screaming! So Zappa, eecch, I can feel your pain. Luckily, my guy is not into Zappa. He's not a prog rock guy, he's a southern rock guy. (OK, I'm not sure which is worse.)

I do have to say, you are a MUCH bigger woman than I am to GO with him to Zappa. I could NOT bring myself to see Lucinda Williams.Ever.Again.

Unknown said...

I would absolutely love it if you actually have a really good time tonight, and you should. For most of his music is really funny--in a sick sort of a way to a certain extent, but still funny!

A Lil Enchanted said...

Oh geez Stace... I can feel your pain on that

I enjoy music from both the 70's and the 80's... but Zappa has just never done it for me. Hope it wasn't too awfully bad for you!

A Lil Enchanted,