So I'm thinking about going back to school. Why? Because I cannot get a job. I have a friend who is helping me and you know what I have discovered? I don't WANT to go back to school.
I know that if I want to ever have a job where I won't have to say "you want fries with that?" will require me to get some training but honestly, at my age, I have NO desire to jump through the financially wasteful fiery hoops that schools want you to jump through. I have a house and kids to take care of...I want to write, why would I waste my time taking modern dance or astronomy? It's stupid! AND I have to pay for it!
Some people enjoyed school, getting a higher education was something that they WANTED to do. Really, I didn't. I never enjoyed school. I was a social person, I enjoyed being social and being in the clubs but academia was so NOT my thing so to think that I have to do it all AGAIN at 41, makes me want to cry. I have people looking at me like I am crazy, like why wouldn't I want to do this? People like THAT liked school. I seem to be surrounded by them. I feel like an idiot because it's just not my thing. Am I crazy?
I can barely get through my days as they are now without getting overwhelmed or falling behind on something else. Throw in four hours of classes a day and you might as well start looking for a cemetery plot for me because I won't survive it.
So what do I do? How do I go about getting a job when I am too stupid to get one and not interested in going back to school? I should just call it quits right now because in this world, there is no place for me! I'm not homeschooling any more so there's no need for me to be at home, we don't make enough for me to be a stay at home mom and really, my kids aren't at home anymore so there's no one for me to be at home for so what's left? I have to take some demeaning, loserish job so that by society's standards, I am productive. Well that just sucks.
Seriously, sometimes it's just too damn painful to get up out of bed....
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12 comments:
aw stacie...you shouldn't have to feel bad for not wanting to go to school if it isnt what you desire to do. Your not too stupid to get a job, you just haven't found one that is your passion. Writing is your passion and you do a great job at that! Take this time to pursue your dream of being a writer, it is one of the first times in years you get to focus on you and not teaching, Jump in with all you have!!!. Thoughts are with you friend.
Well, this is interesting. I totally understand the feeling. I have a couple/few suggestions. 1) Bust your tail writing and seriously try to make that a viable career. It's possible; just damn hard work and sometimes takes awhile to earn big. Earning small to medium is better than nothing. 2) I know what you said about school, but consider getting a degree in journalism or creative writing or public relations or marketing. Something to relate to the writing field that could also land you a spot in a firm or somewhere earning a viable income then bust your tail writing your book. 3) Investigate being a virtual assistant. Know a couple of companies that are good and do that from home while you bust your tail working on your book. LOL... See a theme here?
I'd like to get a master's degree and I've "heard" that it's possible to go back to school without having to pay out of pocket. There is a man with a wife and two kids and he's totally paying his bills from his financial aid. Not sure if he had loans or strictly grants, scholarships, etc. But if you decide you want to pursue something in writing as a degree or training then it may be totally worth it to find something in that field.
I know that at 42 I want to go after my dreams instead of working to help others (companies) realize theirs. I'm in a similar situation so you know I get it. I don't wanna work at Walmart or anywhere like that either. Never get hired anyway 'cause they say I'm overly qualified.
Okay, enough of this way too long comment. Don't give up, okay?! Oh, and YUP! getting up is in the morning is as hard as turd. ;-)
I worked at McDonald's for years when my kids were little...Junior worked nights and I worked days so one of us was always with the kids. I never thought that it was demeaning or loserish, because I was helping to support my family. And to tell you the truth, maybe working a "demeaning or loserish" job for a while will give you the drive to go back to school, so you can be better than people like me.
Stace, if you are going to do it, do it now! I'm 63 and thinking of it. When you get old it is a lot harder. Trust me on that one.
Jenn, don't look down on yourself. You are a good person and fun to read.
JENN!!!! I'm sorry...I so did NOT mean to offend anyone!!!
Its tough times for everyone, and schools push education to keep their own enrollments up.
Education doesn't make you smart if it did look at all the people running our country with all the high powered degrees they have, I can tell you that they don't seem to brilliant to me.
Anyway keep up with your writing..and i wish you the best!
What about a school you do from home? (Online) so you don't have to deal with an actual classroom. I was thinking of looking into doing some classes this way.
Maybe you can try doing temp work. If there are skills you need for that that you don't have, like computer stuff, most of it is easily learned through an online or community college course that won't eat a lot of time.
Temp work will get you out in the field making money, and sometimes companies will wind up hiring you permanently - and if they like your work, they won't be as picky about things like college degrees.
If writing is your passion you should pursue this. Do you have local community papers where you live? A friend of mine volunteered at first with one of our local community papers and within a few months was offered a paying job.
Your chances of getting a job, particularly a more high-paying job, will increase with more education. That's true. There's no law that says you have to go back to school for a full degree program. Maybe you could just take a course or two in an area that might prepare you for work that is in great demand (such as something in the medical field). Hang in there, everyone--no matter what their education--is having trouble finding work now. You are not alone.
I will tell you that if I hadn't "wanted" to go back to school I'd have surely failed. There is no way I could deal with the stress and the tears if it wasn't a personal goal that I really really wanted. I will tell you that being a mom and being a student sucks. It's hard work. It's hard to balance it all. I do it because I wanted to do it...and I make it through it because it was my choice. There are days when I question it!!! haha
DO NOT CALL YOURSELF STUPID! A job does not demean you. You are demeaning yourself by calling yourself stupid.
If you don't want to go back to school, it's not going to benefit you in the way you need it to. Why waste the time and energy?
However, I agree with others, it won't hurt to take a class or two that interests you.
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