It Takes More Than Long Hair to be a Diva

I'm not going to lie to you, I'm in the bitter barn right now.  I shouldn't be because for the most part, life is good.  Unfortunately, however, there is a small part of my life that is like a big, black cloud that I just can't seem to get to move on.  And by big, black cloud I mean a big, fat, loud-mouthed jackass with long-hair that thinks that the world is all about them and because they whine enough, they get their way.

This is a HUGE issue for me and my life right now.

So basically my husband is a drummer without a band right now.  He dedicated five years of his life to this band, put up with mega diva behavior from ONE of his bandmates and we thought that he had a good friendship with the other two.  

Apparently not because when the diva threw a hissy fit, they threw my husband under the bus.  These men who all call each other "brother", clearly don't know the meaning of the word.

What is my definition of a diva? Well, in this case it's a completely self-centered individual who thinks only of himself and what works for him and doesn't care how his actions make others feel or how those actions inconvenience anyone else.  It's his show and we're all just lucky to be able to watch.

News flash, fat ass, you and your show SUCK.

When the diva's behavior became more than my husband could tolerate, he finally spoke up.  No one EVER speaks up to the diva because then he carries on like a whiny little girl and no one wants to hear it.  It's not a pretty trait in a 50+ year old man.  So after my husband spoke up HONESTLY (as a man should), this bastard pretty much made it clear to the band that it was either him or Frank - he refused to play with my husband anymore.  Maybe the other guys were on the fence, maybe they were hoping it would all blow over but the diva essentially played the "I've been here longer and I write 2/3 of the songs" card and so Frank was out.  He was going to take his toys and go home.

And you know what gets me the most?  They all bitched about the diva's behavior, his lack of consideration for anyone and the fact that he is the NUMBER ONE REASON that they don't get to play (because he's also a hypochondriac who is forever with an ailment) and they kept HIM!  And since his little ultimatum, Frank graciously packed up his stuff and acted like a gentleman and what happens from there?  From his supposed friends?

He gets the call to share how they are auditioning other drummers.

ARE YOU FREAKIN KIDDING ME???

So to the band of "Brothers", I hope that you rot in rehearsal hell for YEARS.  I hope that the piece of crap who is nothing but an aging JOKE keeps you there and I hope every time you hear of other bands playing out and getting gigs and doing things that a REAL band does, that you all remember to thank the Diva for putting you guys first - just like you put him.  

Congratulations on keeping yourselves on the road to nowhere.

Comparing the Bestseller Lists

There are a lot of lists out there and to be honest with you, I cannot wrap my brain around how they work.  It seems like a crap shoot most of the time how a book gets on one but you can be certain that the most popular authors with the big publishing houses behind them will be on there first.  

It's not as easy of a trek for us indie authors.

I write, I publish.  After that it's anyone's guess on where those books will show up and on what lists.  I have been blessed enough to hit the "bestseller" status on both Amazon and Barnes and Noble with my books but there is no formula to guarantee that.  

Frustrating as all get-out, I can tell you that!

I have yet to hit a point where I am comfortable spending a lot of money on marketing and promoting my work.  I know plenty of authors do it and I commend them on it and they do see results but I am too scared to spend too much money at this point in my career and then have it not work.  I'll get there some day, just not right now.  So by marketing you get seen by more people, the more people that see you the more they may be inclined to buy your work.  The more people that buy your work, the better your sales stats, blah, blah, blah and then there you are on a list.  I get that but what I find amazing is the vast difference in rankings.

What do I mean?  Okay, this morning my newest book "Trust in Me" is number 32 on Barnesandnoble.com.  And not just in romance!  No!  It is #32 on the site!  That is pretty freakin exciting, right?  I mean, top 100!  There are some seriously big named authors on there all around me!  So I get all giddy and excited and dance around the house and then I jump over to Amazon.com and there is the same book, released the same day and where is "Trust in Me" on their list?  I'm number 1406.  The book is only .99 cents on both sites so it's not like one has the advantage over one another but if you do the math, clearly there's a difference.

A big difference.

Now I understand that the two sites really are vastly different.  For me, when I think of a physical bookstore, I think Barnes and Noble.  But online?  It's Amazon all the way.  So that takes a little of the shine off of my bestseller glory because it's a ranking on a smaller site.   People look at you a little bit more - or take you a little more seriously as a writer - if you are an Amazon best seller.

And don't even get me started on the NY Times or USA Today lists.  I haven't even figured those two out.  If there is a way to get your book on there, I haven't found it.  Although, I am working on a collection/box set with several other indie authors and as of late, collections like this HAVE gotten onto the USA Today list.  We'll also be paying a decent amount of money to be seen so maybe that's a big part of it.  

I know, I know, you gotta spend money to make money, blah, blah, blah.  Someday I'll do it.

Then you have the Goodreads lists or the Shelfari lists...it's exhausting.  Can somebody please just buy the books and save me from obsessing over the lists??